He's a bicycle kid, He's got his Mister T. slippers.
He's a bicycle kid, he's eleven years old.
Dog-faced spawn of a working cla** Tory,
Bicycle kid never does what he's told.
He's a bicycle kid and he wants to get a crossbow.
Bicycle kid had a rabbit that died:
Evil little f**er put his pet through the window,
The he ran to his mother and he cried, cried, cried.
Chorus:
So cry like an onion bicycle kid,
'Coz I'm gonna get your for the things that you did.
Cry like an onion bicycle kid,
You're just another s**er at heart.
Bicyle kid - extortion in the playground.
What does he do with all the money he made?
Bicyle kid in Kentucky Fried Chicken
And the WHAM-BAM-RAMBO machine arcade.
He's a bicycle kid, and his mother's on Valium.
He's a bicycle kid, and his dad's on the lump.
He's a bicycle kid, and his tea's in the micro.
He's a bicycle kid and he's on the dump.
Chorus
Bicycle kid sh**ting in a greenhouse.
Bicycle kid down at the aquadrome.
Bicycle kid in trouble with a policeman.
Bicycle kid "he's a good boy at home".
Bicycle kid grow up and get an Escort.
( Ford Escort, that is. Eighties wide-boy motor )
Bicycle kid grow up and get worse.
Bicycle kid forget to use a condom.
Bicycle kid! It's evolution in reverse!
Chorus
.
.
You're an evil mother f**er.
.
.
fade.