BOTH Who the hell is- SUSAN Heidi? HEIDI Susan? BOTH What kind of girl is she? I wonder sometimes if she Even? HEIDI Likes me SUSAN Even likes me HEIDI She seems to make you smile SUSAN She's got a pretty, tiny nose HEIDI She's got a kick-a** style SUSAN She's got very kicky clothes HEIDI And she owns her apartment too? SUSAN I suppose HEIDI And mind blows SUSAN Quel jeun drefia? Susan and Heidi BOTH She seems so? je ne sais quoi HEIDI She seems so? incroyable SUSAN And I feel so? bourgeois BOTH That's just? moi It's just SUSAN She's so uptown and fancy and Broadway HEIDI She's so downtown and funky and sa**y
SUSAN I wish I could sing like that At least my nose could take her nose in a cage match of noses HEIDI I'm used to being the funny one in the room SUSAN I didn't sign the permission slip for any new lady friends, Hunter HEIDI She's got those eyes SUSAN She's got that b**bs HEIDI I've got these thighs SUSAN I need your shoes BOTH Plus She might try to steal my husband She might try to have my baby I guess I'll just sit back and wait and see What kind of girl is she? What kind of girl is she? What kind of girl is she? SUSAN What kind of girl is SUSAN/HEIDI Are you gonna eat that pickle?