[Verse 1]
I clean out the chimney, or open up the window
Santa Claus is here to help you all
Throw your troubles away, and to grant your wishes
Maybe a new washer it to do the dirty dishes
Or maybe some cash to help you pay the bills
Or maybe a new lover for some holiday thrills
So bring out the eggnog, don't forget to feed the dog
Here's a big turkey, don't eat that hog
[Verse 2]
So you say you're broke, you know I know that ain't no joke
But don't fret long, cause for Santa there's hope
No need to hide your troubles in a cloud of smoke
Besides it never works, and you might just choke
So you sent me a letter, I'll make you feel better
Address it to the North Pole, I send a Gucci sweater
Or maybe you prefer limo, and chauffeur
Or a butler that says "Yes ma'am, yes sir"
Diamonds, and pearls, Fila suits by the dozen
If you can't wear 'em all, give some to your cousins
Then just to spread joy to little girls and boys:
I'll pile up your tree 'till the top with toys
Thundercats, He Men, G.I. Joe
Barbie dolls for the girls, grown-ups get mistletoes
So if you hear footsteps upon your roof
Don't fret, it's Santa with your new gold tooth
The ear is what you wanted, or was it a jag
Wait a minute my friend, let me look in my bag