[Intro: Signor Benedick the Moor] No, I I j- No, I just think Yeah, no But I - Would you shut the f** up I just have something to tell you, alright? God damnit f**ing sh** Uh, just Listen [Verse: Signor Benedick the Moor] Went down to the bar and started spinning a yarn I saw you standing wide with your city-girl charm I asked you for your name and then you did the same I replied Johnny C., you implied Mary Jane We took off in my daddy's truck and took the back lane I don't know why you did it, but you eased most of my pain I looked inside your soul and hoped for you I'd done the same I took your hand in mine you said I look like John Wayne And then I knew, someday I'd marry you When a church in a backyard free of pain and heavily scarred
Whether it's easy or it's hard Whether you cook with bu*ter or lard Whether you like Kirk or Picard Or even if you hate Pulp Fiction And everything I said I swear I say with the utmost conviction There's nothing you could do that wouldn't fit inside my description Of the angel I know you are, my evangelical prescription [Hook: Signor Benedick the Moor] I know it's lame But the song's about you But if it's all the same I swear it's f**ing true There ain't a f**ing thang I wouldn't do if it's for you But I could never say this So for now, for now I guessed I'm doomed [Outro] What are you talking about? None of this sh** ever happened It's a f**ing metaphor, god