Did you ever get an invitation?
A little window to another life?
Got so many tales
A lot of ales and rotten rails
Terrible discussions with the wife
Clawing at the arse-end of the evening
Watch me as I play their rotten game
I get my cods out by the dustbin of the gods
Stand there till the sun comes out again
I got a sea theory, gonna bore my friends
Sea theory, still pushing it
Sea theory, gonna act it out
Sea theory, haven't tested it
Spend a long time frowning at the sandwich
Wearily I bring it into play
Mona's bright: makes that sh** looks so every night
Everything's enormous once again
Washed up with the seaweed and syringes
Tide comes in and then goes out again
It's so very foul and unbelievable ban*l
Underneath the boardwalk in the rain
I got a sea theory, gonna blow your mind
Sea theory, can't defend it
Sea theory, it's a piece of work
Sea theory, gonna make your teeth ache
Sea theory in the disco
One of many theories of the sea
Everybody's songs are neverending till they're gone
Carve a little pleasure out of me
Gonna get my dinner from the chip shop
Now I have to eat it on the hoof
Everybody sighs and everybody multiplies
No one cares too much about the truth
Got a sea theory, it's a pack of lies