One day a man came to my house selling bibles. I didn't want one. He said "Maybe you could spare a meal?" "No!"
He asked "Is your husband home?" "Yes." - even though he'd been dead five years.
And when I'm a ghost I'll haunt you,
When I'm a vampire s** you dry.
Cos it's blood that I think,
and it's blood that I drink.
He wouldn't leave, so I called the police. They asked "Little lady, where do you live?" "A few miles out of town".
They didn't come, so I took my shotgun, I pointed in his face. He left, but "I'll be back for your kids..."
And when I'm a ghost, I'll haunt you.
He came back the next day as he'd promised. I wasn't home, but my son was home.
The leather-lipped man asked him, "would you like a delicious milkshake?" "Yes, I would like a delicious milkshake."
So he took a pint of the milk, and a pint of the cream, and he stirred in a few spoonfuls of lead paint.
He made my baby son drink lead paint and he frothed at the mouth, and his eyes rolled back in his skull and he died.
And when I'm a ghost