MARVIN
Who'd believe that we two
Would end up as lovers?
WHIZZER
Do you want me to reply?
MARVIN
Him and me, you and I
Pa**ionately lovers
WHIZZER
Please don't get morbid
MARVIN
Right
WHIZZER
It's just-
MARVIN
Don't fight
WHIZZER
That I haven't died yet
MARVIN
Just stop it
WHIZZER
I'm sick, but kicking
MARVIN
Geez
WHIZZER
Alright
MARVIN
Louise
WHIZZER
Good night
MARVIN
I'm staying here in this spot
Whether you want me to or not
I'm staying
Here I am, by your side
One old horny lover
WHIZZER
Please go home and don't be scared
MARVIN
What's the fuss? I'm not scared
What good is a lover who's scared?
Hit me if you need to
Slap my face or hold me till winter
Oh, baby, please do
I love you too
My lover
WHIZZER
Marvin, just go home and turn on TV
Drink a little something till you're 'dead'
Think of me around
Sleeping soundly in our bed
Marv, did you hear what I said?
MARVIN
Shut your mouth, go to sleep
Time I met a sailor
Are you sleeping yet or...?
What is what? Whizzer, but
I can't help but feeling I've failed
Let's be scared together
Let's pretend that nothing is awful
WHIZZER
There's nothing to fear
MARVIN
There's nothing to fear'
WHIZZER
Just stay right here
MARVIN AND WHIZZER
I love you
(Dr. Charlotte and Cordelia enter)
CHARLOTTE
Shhh. Maybe he's tired
CORDELIA
Shhh. Maybe he's waiting for us
CHARLOTTE
Shhh. Maybe he's waiting for a visit
CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA
Is it a bad time? We'll come back
If it's a bad time, we'll come back
We'll come in
MARVIN
Look at us, four old friends
Four unlikely lovers
CORDELIA
We don't know what time will bring
WHIZZER
I've a clue
MARVIN
I have too
CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA
Let's look like we haven't
MARVIN, CHARLOTTE, AND CORDELIA
And each say nothing
WHIZZER
Sky!
CHARLOTTE
It's blue!
MARVIN
I love the sky!
CORDELIA
I love the trees!
MARVIN
I love bad weather!
CHARLOTTE
I love the earth beneath my feet!
WHIZZER
I love friends that hover!
MARVIN, WHIZZER, CHARLOTTE, AND CORDELIA
Gee, we love to eat
And we need something sweet
To love!
What a group we four are
Four unlikely lovers
And we vow that we will
Buy the farm, arm in arm
Four unlikely lovers with heart
Let's be scared together
Let's pretend that nothing is awful
WHIZZER, CHARLOTTE, AND CORDELIA
There's nothing to fear
MARVIN
There's nothing to fear
WHIZZER, CHARLOTTE, AND CORDELIA
Just stay right here
I love you. (Whizzer to Marvin, Charlotte to Cordelia)
MARVIN
I love you. (to Whizzer)
WHIZZER, CHARLOTTE, AND CORDELIA
I love you. (Charlotte/Cordelia to Marvin/Whizzer)
MARVIN
I love you (to Charlotte, Cordelia, and Whizzer)
MARVIN, WHIZZER, CHARLOTTE, AND CORDELIA
Who'd have thought that we four
Would end up as lovers'