I'm sorry I was angry
I had a mindset to defend
Getting upset with you
Without much cause
'cause I was jealous of your friends
It felt right to leave
When I doubted everything
And when I did I felt defeat
I knew I'd lost and I was lost
And for the first time
I felt like you'd lost interest
Skipping contacts in your phone list
Pa**ing by my name
Cause I'm not someone that you miss
You just had to make me miss you didn't you
I just had to fall right back
And give myself no time to think
Before all my emotions get the best of me
I'm spitting out teeth
Gritted and worn to the point
That I don't know what the point is now
Now I'm full of what ifs
Give me a second to change the subject
To something I know
I won't forget
Because when we talk
I can feel discomfort in the vibes that we put off
Cut the tension with a knife
And tell me if you think that it bleeds
'cause there are parts of me I don't want you to see
No I don't want you to
This is not
The first time I have tried
To reason with myself
For the cowardly nights I spent wasted
Awake always thinking of things that I hate
That I could've done different
It's me
It's always me
It's always been me
In my head
This is what we're supposed to be
And I'll accept that this is you
If you accept that this is me
Sleep it off
It wasn't love just a crutch
Make sure the door is shut