[Jorma]
Ladies and gentlemen, the mayor of New York
[Andy]
Good morning
It's been brought to my attention that many rap artists claim they run New York
But this is not the case
In fact, I wrote my own song about what it's really like
Please excuse the profanity in advance. Hit it
I RUN NEW YORK!
[Hook: Billie Joe Armstrong]
New York, big city of dreams, and you know that I run this town (I RUN IT!)
The king of the streets, dressed in concrete, skyscrapers on my crown (I'M THE KING!)
So if you want this Big Apple, come try to take a bite (C'MON!)
Cause I run this motherf**ing city and I won't give it up without a fight!
[Verse 1: Andy]
Yo I run New York
It's a pain in the a**
The city's crowded as f**
And it's covered in trash!
And the sanitation chief just shovels sh** in my face
Another transit strike? Aww, f**in' great!
I can't wait
To have another meeting with the labor union
So the mob can bend me over
And then shove their f**ing shoe in!
But I do it
So you can sip your pumpkin latté
I literally run New York and it's exhausting!
[Hook: Billie Joe Armstrong]
I run New York
It's a f**in' headache
It really wears you down (IT su*kS!)
In this lake of bureaucratic bullsh**
It's a miracle I don't drown!
[Verse 2: Andy]
Yo, I double literally run New York:
I run the marathon
Plus I organized it
So I double run the marathon
But no one seems to give a f** that I'm a paragon
Instead they Photoshop me so it's looking like I wear a thong
And laugh at it in my own office when I'm gone
I went to the Knicks game and they booed me on the Jumbotron
Excuse me for trying to help you
They won't be satisfied 'til I'm locked up in Bellevue
I guess they don't tell you
This job s**s dick
I run New York and it feels like sh*t!
[Hook: Billie Joe Armstrong]
The Chief of Police is a major bully
He laughs at my ideas (HE'S A JERK!)
He made fun of my tie last week
And I had to fight back tears
[Verse 3: Andy]
Now on the surface it probably seems like I should quit
Cause I spend every day getting punched in the dick
But at night
I travel down into the subway
Wearing chainmail, locked and loaded for gunplay
And battle the gigantic fire-breathing mutant rats
If I f**in' quit, who the f** would do that?
I'll give you a hint: the answer is no one
That's why I'm in the sewer dressed up like a shogun
Cause on the equinox, a Hell Gate springs
Releasing hounds wreathed in the blood of kings
And no one even knows
They just think I'm a dork
But I still k** those f**ing dogs, cause
I RUN NEW YORK!
[Hook: Billie Joe Armstrong]
I run New York, it's a sh**ty gig
No overtime in my pay (BULLsh*t!)
I asked this city for a f**in' bonus
And they said "no f**in' way" (UNREAL!)
So rotten is this Big Apple
It's crawling with worms inside (COME ON!)
But I run this motherf**ing sh**hole city
And it makes me wanna die!
[Andy]
I RUN NEW YORK!
Thank you