( * original lyrics by Ice Cube * )
Drop a old school beat
Ha-ha
Ha-ha-ha-ha
Plow!
[ VERSE 1 ]
Now the taste of Crystal is fillin up my bladder
What's the time on the rolie? It don't matter
Had a pocket full of phone numbers I was tryin to sort
To make a long story short:
Ran into this girl named Sally
Knew her from the backseat of my homeboy's Navi
She said what's up, yeah, what's the deal?
Check the nappy weave, of course it ain't real
Then I looked down, she was fat in the front
I asked how long, she said, "About 6 months"
"Oh, how time flies when you're havin fun"
She said, "Yeah, but the damage is done"
"Where you been?" "On a little vacation"
"Oh, by the way, congratulations
Who's the lucky man?" She said, "I got him on file"
Then she said, "It's Spice 1", and smiled
I dropped my stout, then everything went blank
"Had a baby by you, the neighborhood skank?"
She said, "Yeah, don't you remember that day?"
I thought back and tried to calculate
Then I said, "Damn, are you sure it's mine?
My homies did the Soultrain on ya plenty of times"
She said, "That day, nah, I was whorin
And your a** is mine", that's when the sweat started pourin
Cause all I seen was Spice 1 up in court
Paying a gang on child support
Then I thought deep about givin up the fetti
What I need to do is kick the b**h in the belly
Nah, cause then I'd really be faded
That's murder one, cause it was premeditated
What should I do? Kidnap the b**h and flee?
How many months left? Damn, only 3
I'm gettin faded
Goddamn, what the f** I done got myself into?
This sh** is dense
Damn, I'm gettin faded
Muthaf**as tryin to take my driver's license and sh**
b**h, you can't fade me
This b**h got a grip on my muthaf**in nuts, mayn
Damn, I'm gettin faded
But you know?
I ain't finna go out
[ VERSE 2 ]
It's crazy, because before I could sleep with her
I had to duck and dodge to try to creep with her
See, the booty in the front was all in place
But the girl had a pitbull face
So I ran, jumped, drove, swam, crawled, hid
Oh Lord, God forbid
The homies see me at the hotel
Cause I know they would love to just go tell
Everybody in the hood that knows you're nasty
Elbows and knees and feet was hella ashy
So hold the big fat bu*t steady
Cause yo, b**h, I got the three rubbers ready
She started gruntin and squeelin like a wild bore
I hit the a** from Cali to Singapore
I dropped her off, man, and now I'm knowin
That I'mma hate myself in the mornin
I got drunk to help me forget
Damn, another day, another hit
sh**, I'm gettin faded
No cigars, n***a
Damn, you can't fade me
You better fire up a muthaf**in blunt and get some Hen-dog
[ VERSE 3 ]
9 months later she's ready to drop the load
And all the partners in the hood already know
That it's 'posed to be mine, and they laughin at me
You know Spice 1 can't be havin that, gee
Thinkin to myself: why did I bang her?
Now I'm in the closet lookin for the hanger
Kaos, Vic Rock and [Name] won't let up
They won't shut up, I'm gettin fed up
Cause I know, you're tryin to break me
And if I find out you're tryin to fade me
I'mma clock yo a** with my shoe
Beat you down and leave a crown or two
That night she went into labor
And the sh** is gettin kinda major
The baby came out, damn, it was a lifesaver
Lookin like my next-door neighbor
She said it was mine, that was her best guess
But let's check the results of the blood test
I started smilin, yeah, cause it read 'negative'
Damn, why did I let her live?
After that I shoula got the gat
And bust and rushed and illed and peeled the cap
But no, I just told the ho who laid me
"Excuse me, b**h, it's a switch, you can't fade me"
Nah, b**h, it ain't even finna go down like that
A n***a like me ain't finna go for the okey-doke
The b**h out here thinkin she get a muthaf**a for his cash and sh**
Playin a muthaf**a for some type of b**h-a** n***a
But you know what?
Before I go for the okey-doke, ho
I'mma let the pistol smoke
And that's real
The b**h tryin to fade me