[Verse 1]
I'm driving high speed tryna make it to work
Headphones still bumping like you parents when you're
Out on the town, throwing up and taking the piss
Chasing dirty b**hes around that you know you won't miss
And I insist, take the seat, i've been walking all day
But i'm the most chivelrest ba*tard you'll ever meet so
Okay, here, lend me an ear, i'll tell you about my darkest fantasies, 50 shades of cake it'll be done in the pantry
No stopping me, with my foot on the pedal, yes it is impressive b**h and yes I do want a medal
Throwing pebbles at pedestrians, retirees and little kids, mother f**er i'm a rapper you know that I don't give a sh**
Walk around town with my hands in my pocket, you call it wa*king in public I call it misplacing my wallet
Are you judging me like Australian idol, even Kyle will agree that i'm disgusting and vile
[Hook, Jasper Jones]
Scrambled eggs in the morning with Benedict sauce
And cheese and toast and who*es
I got b**hes and eggs and thoughts in my head
That i don't wanna work no more
Rspca, free range, organic eggs for my brains
I've got millions of eggs, and eggs in my bed
I'll be s**in' on omelettes for days
[Verse 2]
Ever since a young buck i've been told that i'm a nuisance
A useless waste of space with potential but don't you use it
Okay i'll prove it, with my hand to the sky
A bad attitude that says man read between the lines
Copped numerous fines, never paying them on time
Wish my life was a ca**ette and i could press rewind
I'd definitely find, half my book re written
But what's the fun in life with speed bumps and careful precision
And i'd in vision my Indonesian teacher givin', me private lesson on the art of circumsision, on that part i would't listen, i'd just hope she'd try and show me and then explode in her vision on my semen she is choking
Are you joking
You're really gonna say that, what girl is gonna date a guy that has no respect for girls and makes lame raps, well definitely not you, coz your ugly and smell worse than my shoe stepping in the sh** that dogs do
[Hook, Jasper Jones]
Scrambled eggs in the morning with Benedict sauce
And cheese and toast and who*es
I got b**hes and eggs and thoughts in my head
That i don't wanna work no more
Rspca, free range, organic eggs for my brains
I've got millions of eggs, and eggs in my bed
I'll be s**in' on omelettes for days
[Verse 3]
Been called all sorts of names, twisted, deranged
Lazy and complacent, arrogant dick in a haze
Unrecourseful, what a waste
No abortion, what a shame
I wear a ring that says my name, let me imprint it in your face
That will teach you not to say that awful sh** again
Huff puff goes the dragon, I spit magic, this fire will burn you, stay, away from me, i'm a head case, i need sedating
No wine in this house coz amy drunk it, so save me please
Ahhh damn what can I say
I'm living like a slave on the minimum wage
Everything is okay, i'm still enjoying my day
But if you don't shut up b**h you'll get a fist to your face
Nah but on a better note i'll be coming home
The end of the day is near it's time to grab my phone
Call up beyond blue and say that i'm alone
There's no woman here to cook so my brains i'm gonna blow
Out on the stove while cooking french toast
Bitta' egg and bacon added, and yes of course avocado
Here's a very bad joke, hanging around with Robin William's but he didn't seem to laugh though
Oh, that changes your perspective, then your probably infected with being too sensitive
Wait here actually this will fix the throbbing warm milk, a dummy bib and mash potatoes for your problems
[Hook, Jasper Jones]
Scrambled eggs in the morning with Benedict sauce
And cheese and toast and who*es
I got b**hes and eggs and thoughts in my head
That i don't wanna work no more
Rspca, free range, organic eggs for my brains
I've got millions of eggs, and eggs in my bed
I'll be s**in' on omelettes for days