[Rhett:] You pull out your photos of your wedding in the spring And you're confronted by your double-chin and your bald spot glistening You could get a membership At the fitness hut down the road Or you could pick your mouse up And slim yourself down And even give yourself a fro [Link:] Your high-school reunion Is coming next Friday And you know everyone Will ask to see some Pictures of the babies that you've made But the problem is Your kids head is big I mean we're talking alien size here Well just cut and paste a hat Or at least a do-rag And it won't seem so severe [Rhett and Link:] Photoshop your memories A picture's worth A thousand words So a few white lies Shouldn't hurt [Rhett and Link (alternating):]
Your birthday This past Monday Was a fun day Except for one thing Your mother-in-law Who makes your skin crawl [Both:] Stuck her face in every frame You'd prefer To remember That day without Her tattooed brows The simplest solution Decrease the resolution [Both:] And crop that woman out [Rhett and Link:] Photoshop your memories Your real life may be sub-par But you can be who you want people to think you are Make yourself thin Give yourself abs Remove that mole Say no to crack Say you went to the alps In a luxury car With a Swedish model Just be who you want people to think you are Photoshop your memories A picture's worth A thousand words So a few white lies Shouldn't hurt