She was asleep when I hobbled to the bed
With a broken foot bleeding
I clawed at her head
"The mirror tumbled on me", I cried
"But it wasn't my fault", I lied
I spent my whole life neurotic and fat
Now I'm just a three-legged cat
Doctor said, "We'll have to amputate that"
So now I'm just a three-legged cat
A three-legged cat