You know man,
Sometime life get you down
And you start to think you got it pretty bad.
Remember, there always people out there
Who got it badder than you.
And no matter how bad or crappy
Life start to seem,
Know that you always got the Rasta Man.
Drivin' in my car,
Goin' real fast
I got "Cats" in the deck
Original broadway cast.
"Memories" comes on,
It's my favorite jam,
Then I hit some black ice
This is not what I planned.
I manage to get the car back on the road
Then a drunk prick hit me and I start to roll.
Now I drool on myself,
Eat out of a straw,
And I share apple sauce
With my grandpa.
But the Rasta Man
Has got the Rasta Plan,
To get everybody dancin'
To the Rasta Band.
And if you're white like me,
Work on your Rasta Tan.
But everone's invited
To the Rasta Jam,
So jam on!
Woo-ooh-ooh!
Jam on!
Woo-ooh-ooh!
Well I was sittin' in the lobby,
Waitin' for my doc'
I got both of my eyes
Focusin' in on da clock.
This is the longest day
I can remember my whole life.
Well the doctor comes in,
Say he ain't wearin no grin
He says I got some bad news
For you and your next of kin.
He says you got "The Clap"
And you gave it to your wife...Oh no no no!
But the Rasta Man
Has got the Rasta Plan,
To get everybody dancin'
To the Rasta Band.
And if you're white like me,
Work on your Rasta Tan.
But everone's invited
To the Rasta Jam,
So jam on!
Woo-ooh-ooh!
Jam on!
Woo-ooh-ooh!
I'm sittin' at home,
Alone in my room,
Wanna have some fun
So I grab the vacuum.
I know that I swore
I'd give it up for Lent.
But this here vacuum
Has a special attachment.
For a while it s**,
And then it get stuck,
I call 9-1-1,
I hope I ain't outta luck.
The doc put me under
I woke up with a shock
Cause now
I'm the first amputee on my block!
But the Rasta Man
Has got the Rasta Plan,
To get everybody dancin'
To the Rasta Band.
And if you're white like me,
Work on your Rasta Tan.
But everone's invited
To the Rasta Jam,
So jam on!
Woo-ooh-ooh!
Jam on!
Woo-ooh-ooh!
Well I was sittin' in the park
Around 3 PM,
When a man walked up
He coulda been my twin.
He walked over to a group
Of tiny little boys
And he asked them to play
With all his shiny little toys.
Well the police came up
Point a gun at my chest,
And I say "Officer,
I'm not the one to arrest!"
They say "Forget about it boy,
We got you on tape!"
So here I am
In jail for statuatory rape, Oh no...
But the Rasta Man
Has got the Rasta Plan,
To get everybody dancin'
To the Rasta Band.
And if you're white like me,
Work on your Rasta Tan.
But everone's invited
To the Rasta Jam,
So jam on!
Woo-ooh-ooh!
Jam on!
Woo-ooh-ooh!
I went to this party
Down the street,
The booze was flowin'
The b**hes was sweet.
I see this girl
She was over in the corner
And all night she be lookin' me over.
So I stroll over to her
Say "Baby, your place or mine?"
She say, "Ours."
And that confuse me a bit,
But drunk and horny
I didn't give no sh**.
Never felt no worse
Than oh in the morn,
My mom said "Son,
Our condom was torn!"
But the Rasta Man
Has got the Rasta Plan,
To get everybody dancin'
To the Rasta Band.
And if you're white like me,
Work on your Rasta Tan.
But everone's invited
To the Rasta Jam,
So jam on!
Woo-ooh-ooh!
Jam on!
Woo-ooh-ooh!