I was sittin' in a bar room just drinking my beer when a cowboy came over and he said loud and clear "you've been seen with my wife now i want your life. we can do it in here or we can do it outside." Well i'm a meek minded fellow that's never been yellow so i stepped outside and kicked him in the crotch. Well it slowed him down but when he came around he stomped on me and then he stomped on my watch. Chorus: John Cameron Swayze i know this sounds crazy but my wrist watch is busted and i can't understand. A cowboy stomped it flat and i freaked out over that now i feel naked with it gone from my hand Recitation: Oh, John Cameron, me and that watch had been together 13 years. It's been shot at, dipped in beer, one time i even tied it to my motor boat and drove it up to the beach. People thought i was crazy John Cameron but i knew you'd understand. I've hocked everything i own but i can never hock that watch because it's never let me down. Besides, the pawn shop would never pay me any money for it.
Resume singing in a ballad style: So when that cowboy stomped it flat i freaked out over that. I came up off the ground and i beat him fair and square. But he couldn't take a lickin' and now he's stopped tickin'. And now i am headin' for the electric chair. Second Chorus: John Cameron Swayze i know this sounds crazy but my wrist watch is busted beyond repair. A cowboy stomped it flat and i freaked out over that and now i am headed to the electric chair. Recitation: That cowboy's wife came over to see me the other day, John Cameron, and she told me that she and i were just going to ride off into the sunset together. Not only that but she bought me a brand new watch. A bullava. I told her to stick it in her ear! (repeat second chorus and fade)