Well, I was out at the Long Branch, and I was talkin' to this girl And every hound dog in the joint was sniffing around her I was playing it slow and cool, being the gentleman that I am Well, then this grease ball with long black slick back hair Struts right up to her like I wasn't even standing there He looks her up and down and co*ks his eyebrow and he says, "Baby, damn." [Chorus] How do you get in those jeans? Mercy you looking fine How do you get in those jeans baby, and tell me how do it? She looked at him and smiled and said I thought you'd never ask He looked at me and said that's how that's done son, just like that I wanted to be mad at him, but to tell you the truth I was really kinda impressed He said you might get slapped 9 times out of 10 But there's always one that wants a little B.S. kinda man So I walked up to the next girl I saw who wasn't wearing a dress, and I leaned in and said [Chorus] How do you get in those jeans?
Mercy you looking fine How do you get in those jeans baby, and tell me how do it? (I sure did) Well, I woke up later in a hospital bed, with a half-pound of gauze wrapped around my sore head Some of my teeth were gone, and I was drinking mashed taters through a straw You see, uh, turns out the girl that I propositioned had man, with a chip on his shoulder and blunt object in his hand Who proceeded to express his disapproval of the lines that I crossed Well, the told me I could leave, so I put my clothes back on I stumbled past the waiting room just minding my own And then this over nurse night nurse, from out of nowhere comes up to me and she says, "Excuse me sir, but um…" [Chorus] How do you get in those jeans? Mercy you looking fine How do you get in those jeans baby, and tell me how do it? Uh, well um I guess I did need a ride home I gotta tell myself it was the right thing to do Don't judge me --- .