[Verse 1: Spose]
If there really is a big fluffy Jesus in the clouds
Let him know right now that I take it all back
If there really is a muscular, cackling, red Devil in the ground
You should tell him save me a shack
But since I never saw either at my local Walmart
Shopping, yelling at their kids in front of my optics
I've been operating under the premise that neither existed
Because I base my beliefs in logic
But if it's really true, what you say, and when my body's in the ground
I'll either float on up or drop right down
Then I'm nervous for the verdict, as a person I'm imperfect
I've been doing dirt lurking in the gutter with the vermin
I don't deserve to go North when I'm gone
Glenfiddich rivers, swan shaped bongs
And some big tittied angels floating over ponds
Singing songs more soothing than Bed Bath & Beyond
No, I deserve my skin scorched, skies made of skulls
Sasquatches made of fire, as I fall into a gulch, everything black
I'd give my left nut and my dick for the chance to go back
[Chorus: Spose & Kristina Kentigian]
You and I both know I can't shut my mouth
But before you blow my candle out
Would you please just listen to me here right now?
Before you blow my candle out
‘Cause if I had a second time around, I would turn it all around
If I had a second time around, I would turn it all around
[Verse 2: Spose]
Man that's what they all say, you're done
No, no, no, shut the f** up and listen for once!
‘Cause I've been sitting on your shoulder, as you've grown colder
All of these years, yelling in your ear, but you wouldn't hear
You had another plan, too big for little me
Let me put it in a rap simile you'll understand
I gave you a fair shake
Kind of like a Ferris Wheel, during an earthquake
Get it? Like you didn't when you had it
Couldn't get it locked down, no, don't bother with a frown
You were healthy in the mental, potential with the pencil
Could've just filled in the stencil but you're tempted by the Devil
Content to just to settle, get a bronze medal
You laid your picnic in the wrong meadow
‘Cause now you're trembling and mumbling, defending what you've done to him
You took the low road, there's a toll booth coming!
And guess who's in the booth, man, not I
It's the one that the burglars are meeting when they die
And the murderers and neighborhood circlers, guy
It's not a piece of cake if you want a piece of the pie
So I'll have dinner with the winners while you simmer with the sinners
Turn your summers into winters, what a bummer, you can whimper
You could've been a star, just a glimmer
Now let me blow your candle out and make it dimmer
[Chorus: Spose & Kristina Kentigian]
You and I both know I can't shut my mouth
But before you blow my candle out
Would you please just listen to me here right now?
Before you blow my candle out
‘Cause if I had a second time around, I would turn it all around
If I had a second time around, I would turn it all around
[Bridge: Spose]
Ladies and gentlemen of the congregation, we are gathered here today to celebrate the loss of a demon: Peter Sparker
And may he never live again
A scourge on this Earth
May our children never repeat his mistakes (Hallelujah!)
And may he burn eternally
[Verse 3: Spose]
What do you want me to do? You f**ing sorry excuse
You dug your own hole, lie in it, dude
No, no, no, that apology's cute, but all will be through
I'll blow your candle like the chances you blew
Yeah, you had some moments in the radiance
But then you'd always go, skulking back into the shade again
You disappointed your family, shamed friends
I got a list, here's the order of my list that it's in
It goes your daughter, your mother, your girl, your brother
Jeff, Cam, Matt, your father, sister, and some others
So while you wither like Bill
Your little life will be forgotten while you're rottin'
Wikipedia pages, they will be fadin'
While you're waitin' for a pardon from this run-on sentence, unpunctuated arson
While you stand there bare
Your closet full of skeletons dancing like the flames on your hair
Hey, don't be lachrymose, Spose, you're your own foes
Make this bed of coals, you can go and sleep there
[Chorus: Spose & Kristina Kentigian]
You and I both know I can't shut my mouth
But before you blow my candle out
Would you please just listen to me here right now?
Before you blow my candle out
‘Cause if I had a second time around, I would turn it all around
If I had a second time around, I would turn it all around