[Verse 1]
To say I'm depressed is only scratching the surface
Always feel the need to be the one that goes furthest
I'mma wind up burning in the Devil's furnace
Gun to my head, wonder what I did to deserve this
I don't deserve to feel this way
Feel this pain. I'm not okay
Barely making music cause I sleep all day
Don't even have the motivation to go and get paid
[Hook]
Midnight thoughts. Laying alone in the dark
Stuck in my head, go for a walk in the park
Suicidal thinking, can't stop when I start
Gun co*ked to the brain and the bullet departs
[Verse 2]
I've been drinking the syrup, but it ain't for the cough
Popping pills is the only way to keep from going off
Musics all I got, yeah, I gotta reach the top
Gotta make it rapping cause my life is the cost
f**ed up, can't focus. Mind in a haze
Only look forward to when my consciousness fades
Stuck in my mind. Stuck in a maze
Running in circles till my life is erased
Man why even bother? My life's already over
I don't see myself living I don't see me getting older
I should go ahead and end it. At least I'll have closure
Maybe try to drive before the hangover
I've wanted to die since I was nine years old
Tried to run away once, slept out in the cold
But I had to get away. Packed my sh** and hit the road
Tired of getting punched and grabbed by the throat
[Hook]
[Verse 3]
Because of my step-dad I'm an alcoholic
Tried to drink away my childhood. sh** was catastrophic
But I can't forget the pain. Can't forget the conflict
f** that n***a he was real diabolic
Moms couldn't do sh** she was scared too
He'd hurt us both, he's a real bad dude
Had to pretend life's good, but we know that's untrue
Hurt my little brother beat his a** black and blue
But that's just where it started, life only got worse
Probably won't make it past twenty, I'm in the back of a hearse
Life so sh**ty man you'd swear I was cursed
Embrace d**h with open arms plunge into my grave headfirst
Didn't know how to say it so I put it in a song
Told to keep my head up but I'm just not that strong
Told it's just a phase, it'll get better but you're wrong
Drowning all my sorrows at the bottom of a bong
[Hook]x2