Morticia (Spoken):
She's perky
Gomez (Spoken):
She's bubbly
Morticia (Spoken):
She's optimistic
Gomez(Spoken):
Where did we go wrong?
Morticia:
We taught her to hunt
Gomez:
We taught her to aim
Morticia:
We gave her a bow
Gomez:
We gave her no shame
Morticia:
We gave what we had
Gomez:
Made sure she was bad
Both:
Did all that we could to keep her sad
Gomez:
We told her to stay away from modern jazz
Morticia:
We gaver her that week long trip to Alcatraz
Gomez:
We promised she'd be equipped
Both:
And filled her crypt with woe
What'd we know?
Gomez:
We took her to funerals in the morning mist
Morticia:
We took her to slaughter houses
Gomez:
Schindler's list
Morticia:
We taught her to scowl and sneer and domineer
Gomez:
On cue
Both:
What did we do?
Where did we go wrong?
Gomez (Spoken):
Are we good parents?
Both:
Where did we go wrong?
Morticia (Spoken):
Are we cliche?
Both:
Somewhere in between
Guilt and guillotine
We forgot to notice that our daughter lost her way
Where did we go wrong?
Morticia:
And can we fix this?
Gomez:
Maybe it's a pa**ing phase
Both:
But if she's going wrong
Then what will change her ways?
Gomez (Spoken):
That's it! We'll cancel this dinner
Morticia (Spoken):
We'll circle the wagon
Gomez (Spoken):
And give these "goody-licious" Beinekes the boot!
Morticia:
We must intervene
Gomez:
We shouldn't delay
Morticia:
She's barely eighteen
Gomez:
So what do we say?
Morticia:
We know the occult
Gomez:
That's certainly true
Morticia:
We're to consult
Gomez:
Morticia, with you
Morticia:
So why all the fuss?
Gomez:
My darling, discuss
Morticia:
She needs only us
Gomez:
It's us, only us
Morticia:
We've always been there for her
To swear for her
Gomez:
Discourage dental care for her
Both:
Do well for her
Excel for her
Make home a living hell for her
So where did we go wrong
Is not the question
Resolute and strong
Is our next move
Gomez:
We'll tell her today
Morticia:
Do what we say
Both:
Send all the Beinekes back to the fray
Turn them away at first sight
And that's where we'll go right?
Both(Spoken):
No dinner tonight!