[Verse 1: Lil Dicky]
Another Friday afternoon
Dicky chillin in his room
Got a teddy on the bed, you bet he playing little spoon
Pimpin I ain't fittna move sh**
b**hes getting stupid
But I ain't getting hammered less you handing me a tool kit
And yea I know the cool kids are drinkin at the bar
But I just ate a chicken parm
And then got faded in ma car
And there's tomato on ma navel, as I'm layin in ma arms
Debating if it's safe to wait because bathrooms kinda far
Goddamn.
I don't wanna go nowhere
Why the f** these b**hes call ma cell
Ion't really care what the f** they do
I just wanna lay in bed and jerk off ma self
Sun is going down, I bet the club been going down
But I don't wanna f** with nuffin less it's something in the house
And now I'm naked on the couch
With raisenets in ma mouth
I'm playin a stupid asian in NBA 2k12
And I'm beatin that a** with the Utah jazz,
Youjizz on the tablet, loading multiple tabs
As I pack bowls, mac pro, chattin with a black ho
Dat want a redskin sack, call dat b**h orakpo
Crack flow, f**in with a lotta f**in snacks bro
Cookies in the oven, whatcha know bout how I stack dough
[Hook: Lil Dicky]
And I ain't got no maf**an plans ya diggg
It's Friday night and I'm stayin in
Don't wanna drink, man you couldn't even pay the kid
Who knew that layin in the crib would make a hit
So put ya hands in the air if you stayin innnn
If you don't even care what day it is
Ya had a long week, roll weed, take a hit,
Go on Demand, take a gander and play some sh**tt
[Verse 2: Lil Dicky]
Okay ma cell is getting bombed yo
b**hes want a don
To come meet em greet em leave with em, freak em at they condo
Ma penis like Chicago
D Rose pronto
But I won't be scorin less it's fifa with ronaldo
Cause I ain't comin out, I'm getting freaky, Michael Jackson
Keepin up with the kardashians
As I'm eatin easy mac and
As I'm peein I'm seein penis with pieces of a napkin
Need to clean it, I'm creamin without a boo, dis ain't Aladdin
Achu, das what the rest ya'll do erry time ya'll spit some sicknin sh**
The fridge gotta lil bit left in it so now I'm raiden sub zero to finish him
Damn... how you do dat there, you kickin it like Liu Kang here
Ma pubic hair super bare whatcha know about a j** with nare
And iont think I wanna brag, but stayin inside the pad
Was basically the greatest day that I've had
Holla back if you don't really wanna pregame, and wait for cabs
Would rather eat a f**in cheese cake, and take a nap
I'm double bundled up under covers I'm comfy den a maf**a
Bumpin to something usher, while grubbing on some fuddruckers
Say I ain't the man ho
Playin on demand shows
You can get retarded, but lil dicky think he stayin home
[Hook]