Take a step in my mind, if you wish
But first, identify this little bit of a twist
There's no catchy chorus here to entice
Just my raw thoughts converted to rhymes
That hopefully provide some advice
Now that disclaimer's out of the way
Let me jump directly into what I have to say
I've spent most of my years fake front forming
In order to disperse the nosey people swarming
I've become a master at concealing my feelings
I don't want people dabbling in my personal dealings
Dealing with my heart, my mind, and such
I'm thinking people don't care about those things too much
So I decided to shift my focus to other things
Like pursuing and achieving what I thought was my dream
Finish school, graduate with a degree in my fist
Then enter the job market as a rich pharmacist
The plan was laid out but it fell flat on the execution
Now it's a different career path I gotta be choosing
I guess I can take some comfort from the fact that
There are plenty of others who have been where I'm at
But still, I can't help but feel off course
A map won't help me in this case, so I check with the Source
I know I've been blessed with the gift to burst
A verse and I believe most concur but first
I should get a high paying job from a stellar education
To lay down a financially stable foundation
For my yet to be discovered significant other
Economic times will get tougher if she becomes a mother
I need to get my priorities organized
Expand on positives, get negatives minimized
At this moment in time, I'll gladly pursue this music
And use it to deviate from the typical rubric
That most rappers follow for their songs nowadays
I'll admit that set formula certainly pays
But I won't change who I am just to stack mad cash
It was easy to deal with that internal clash
I'm just gonna stay true to me
Transfer that truth into something musically
I've seen plenty of artists step on the scene then leave
And it makes me wonder how many songs I could possibly conceive
Before my mind goes blank and I can't make any more
Times like these makes me that wish I knew what was in store
But I don't, so I'm just gonna stay grinding
Designing and reciting rhyming lines with impeccable timing
Some people think I'm a decent guy, hardly
Frequently, I wonder why God stills wants me
Pick about just any expectation I'm far from it
I rise when I fall, but more often I plummet
My heart has been smashed into indefinite pieces
I know the only one who can mend them back together is Jesus
But taking action and actually handing Him the fragments
Is a reaction easier said than put it into practice
Fact is, everything I've stated is how I feel
What's past the present, only God can reveal
The future is unknown territory I tread
But every so often I gaze past the satellites to planet ahead