[INT GRAND CENTRAL STATION]
[Serena walks in, a girl watches her and takes a photo with her cell phone]
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over): Hey Upper East Siders, Gossip Girl here... and I have the biggest news ever. One of my many sources, Melanie91, sends us this: Spotted at Grand Central, bags in hand: Serena van der Woodsen. Was it only a year ago our It-Girl mysteriously disappeared for quote 'boarding school'? And just as suddenly she's back. Don't believe me? See for yourselves: Lucky for us, Melanie91 sent proof. Thanks for the photo, Mel!
[Rufus takes a look around the station and finds his son (DAN) and daughter (JENNY), he walks up and hugs them]
RUFUS: Dan, Jenny! Over here!
JENNY: Hey, dad!
RUFUS: Hey, hey! You made it. Welcome back! How was your weekend? How was your mom?
DAN: She's fine.
JENNY: Good... fine, I guess.
DAN: She's good and fine.
RUFUS: Like 'Maybe I should never have left Manhattan' fine or 'Taking a time-out from my marriage was the best idea I've ever had' fine?
DAN: Dad, you know... I'm starving.
RUFUS: Let's go home. I'm cooking. Caprese salad with a little mozzarella di Bufala... yeah, I'm gonna make you guys...
[Rufus puts an arms around Jenny and they walk off, Dan turns around and notices Serena]
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over): Spotted - Lonely Boy... can't believe the love of his life has returned. If only she knew who he was. But everyone knows Serena. And everyone is talking. [EXT NEW YORK CITY]
[Several people are standing in the streets, looking at the newest 'Gossip Girl' entry on their cell phones]
GOSSIP GIRL: Wonder what Blair Waldorf thinks. Sure, they're BFFs but we always thought Blair's boyfriend Nate had a thing for Serena. [INT HOME OF THE WALDORFS - BATHROOM]
[BLAIR takes a look at a new text message: 'Serena is Back!!', she leaves the bathroom and rejoins a party, her mother, ELEANOR, is talking to a friend]
ELEANOR: ...I have to design a dress for this woman.
[Eleanor turns to Blair]
ELEANOR: Blair, if you're gonna to wear one of my designs tell me about it so we can at least get it properly fitted.
BLAIR: Thanks, mom. Keep that in mind. Great party.
[Eleanor turns back to her friend]
ELEANOR: She is my best advertisement.
[NATE, his father, HOWIE, and another guest are standing together]
PARTY GUEST: So, Nate, started thinking about college?
HOWIE: Well, actually I'm a Dartmouth man.
NATE: Yes, dad's always spoken very highly of Dartmouth. But I would like to check out west. You know, maybe USC, UCLA?
HOWIE: His mother wouldn't hear of it. Dartmouth is far enough away for her.
NATE: Yes, well... Dartmouth is my first choice.
[Blair walks up to her boyfriend, Nate, and his father, also called 'The Captain']
BLAIR: Excuse me, captain. Nate, can I borrow you?
NATE: Eh, sure. Excuse me for a second.
[CHUCK, a friend of Nate's is sitting on the couch with ISABEL and KATI]
CHUCK: Nathaniel, any interest in some fresh air?
[Chuck signals Nate that he wants to smoke a joint with him]
NATE: When I get back?
BLAIR: If he gets back!
[Blair leads Nate into her bedroom and pushes him onto the bed]
NATE: What's going on?
BLAIR: I wanna do this... It... Now.
NATE: Now now? You wanted to wait...
BLAIR: Not anymore.
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over): Better lock it down with Nate, B. Clock's ticking.
[Chuck plays with his drink, looking bored, Isabel and Kati are reading their text messages]
KATI: My god, you'll never believe what's on 'Gossip Girl'.
ISABEL: Someone saw Serena get off a train at Grand Central.
CHUCK: Good, things were getting a little... dull around here. [EXT HOME OF THE WALDORFS]
[The doorman opens the door of a town car, Serena gets out]
SERENA: Thank you. [INT BLAIR'S BEDROOM]
[Blair and Nate are kissing on the bed, undressed]
BLAIR: I love you. Nate Archibald. Always have, always will.
NATE: I love you too. [INT HOME OF THE WALDORF'S]
[Serena walks in and gets noticed by Eleanor]
ELEANOR: Serena van der Woodsen? Is that you?
[Eleanor knocks on the door]
ELEANOR: Blair, it's Serena!
NATE: Serena?
BLAIR: Serena is at school. Kiss me.
NATE: No, I think I heard your mom say she's here. Don't you wanna go say hey?
[Nate gets of the bed and starts getting dressed]
BLAIR: Yeah... totally. [INT HOME OF THE WALDORFS]
[Serena is walking through the party guests who start talking behind her back]
PARTY GUESTS: ...I heard she is pregnant... rehab... she looks good...
[Serena walks up to her mother, LILY, who is talking to a friend]
LILY: So I told him: Forget it, I don't care if it's mahogany. It clashes with my sofa.
SERENA: Mom... mom! Hey.
LILY: Oh, Serena, darling.
[They hug each other]
SERENA: So, were is he? What, they haven't let him out yet?
LILY: Let's not discuss this right now, ok? I thought you might want to see some of your friends.
SERENA: Thanks.
[Serena notices Nate on the other side of the room, Blair opens her bedroom door and walks into the room, blocking Nate from Serena's view, Serena and Blair hug]
BLAIR: Hi, Serena, so good to see you.
SERENA: Good to see you.
BLAIR: Come, we're about to have dinner.
ELEANOR: I'll set a place for you at the table next to Blair.
SERENA: Yeah, actually... there's somewhere I have to go.
BLAIR: You're leaving?
SERENA: Yeah, I just... I don't feel well. I just wanted to come by and say hi. I'll see you at school tomorrow.
[Serena leaves the party]
BLAIR: School... so I guess she's back for good.
KATI: Didn't you know she was coming?
BLAIR: Course I did. I just... wanted it to be a surprise.
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over): Word is that S bailed on B's party in under 90 seconds and didn't even have one lemon shot. Has our bad girl really gone good? Or is it all just part of the act? [INT OSTROFF CENTER]
[Serena walks in, pa**es the nurse's station and looks into a patient's room]
NURSE YOUNG: lady, you can't be here. Visiting hours are over.
SERENA: I'm family. He's my brother. [INT HOME OF THE HUMPREYS - DAN'S BEDROOM]
[Dan is looking at the blog of 'Gossip Girl']
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over): Why'd she leave? Why'd she return? Send me all the deepth. And who am I? That's one secret I'll never tell. you know you love me. XOXO Gossip Girl. END OF TEASER [INT OSTROFF CENTER - ERIK'S ROOM]
[Serena's brother, ERIK, finds Serena sleeping on a chair next to his bed and wakes her up]
ERIK: Serena... Serena, hey.
SERENA: Hey, how are you?
ERIK: You know, I've been better.
SERENA: Erik, I know I've been a terrible sister. I'm so happy to see you.
ERIK: Must be a lot of rumors why you're back.
SERENA: Yeah, but none of them mentioned you.
ERIK: Just like mom wants, hm?
[Lily enters]
LILY: What do I want, baby? For Serena sleeping in her own bed, possibly wearing pajamas.
SERENA: Morning, mom. Hey, I was just about to ask the doctor if I could take Erik to breakfast. Wanna come?
LILY: Ehm, I think what I'll do is to get him a croissant down the street.
[Lily leaves the room, Serena storms after her]
ERIK: Serena, don't!
SERENA: Let me guess: You told everyone Erik is just visiting grandpa in Rhode Island.
LILY: Your aunt Carol in Miami.
SERENA: So, you're actually hiding him. He tries to take his own life and you're worried it will cost you 'Mom Of The Year'?
LILY: Serena, you've been gone. Doing who knows what with god knows who...
SERENA: I told you, boarding school was not like that.
LILY: As happy as I am to have you home, you have no idea what it's been like. [INT HOME OF THE HUMPHREYS - KITCHEN]
[Jenny organizes handwritten invitations, Rufus is making breakfast, Dan walks in]
RUFUS: Guess who's dad is cool!
JENNY: It's a trick question.
DAN: Yeah, 'cause it can't be ours.
RUFUS: Look at this!
[Rufus hands Dan an issue of 'Rolling Stone', Dan reads the front page]
DAN: 'Top 10 Forgotten Bands Of The '90s'.
RUFUS: Yeah, check out who's number nine.
JENNY: He is very proud.
DAN: Hey, hey way to be forgotten!
RUFUS: But that's how you get remembered.
JENNY: Maybe you'd care if dad's band was on 'Gossip Girl'.
DAN: What? I don't read 'Gossip Girl'. That's... that's for chicks.
JENNY: So that wasn't your laptop you've been to last night to read all about Serena van der Woodsen.
[Dan takes the magazine from Rufus]
DAN: Holy stone, wow! Let me take a look at this again, dad. Very cool, looking hot, number nine!
RUFUS: Hey, what are you working on?
JENNY: It's called the 'Kiss On The Lips' party. Everyone's going.
DAN: You're invited to that?
[Jenny stares at Dan]
DAN: Well, no offense if I sound surprised... since I've never been invited.
JENNY: One of the girls in my art cla** saw my calligraphy and she said that if I addressed all the invitations then I would get one.
RUFUS: Sounds very fair. Sweatshops could learn a thing or two.
JENNY: Dad, this is not a platform for me to end capitalism. That's why you make us go to private schools.
RUFUS: That's for your education.
JENNY: So we should be anonymous losers who eat lunch alone and never get invited to parties?
DAN: Works for me.
JENNY: Mom thinks it's a good idea.
RUFUS: And her judgment is always sound, right? Jenny, if you wanna go to that party you should go. You kids could use some fun. EXT THE PALACE HOTEL
[Serena walks up to the front entrance, Nate is already waiting for her]
SERENA: Nate?
NATE: Oh, hey! Uhm, your mom told me you guys are staying here at The Palace.
SERENA: Yeah, we're renovating... again. You know my mom: If it's not broke, break it. So what are you doing here?
NATE: Oh, I just wanted to see how you were. You seemed kind of upset last night.
SERENA: I got to get going and change for school. I'm gonna be late.
NATE: Serena...
SERENA: No, no.
NATE: But you're back now.
SERENA: I didn't come back for you. Look, Blair's my best friend and you're her boyfriend and she loves you. That's the way things are supposed to be. [[EXT NEW YORK CITY]
[Dan runs across the street to catch his bus to school]
TAXI DRIVER: Hey, watch were you're going! [INT BUS]
[Chuck and Nate are sitting next to each other, Dan is standing in the alley]
CHUCK: Serena looked effing hot last night. There's something wrong with that level of perfection... it needs to be violated.
NATE: You are deeply disturbed.
CHUCK: And yet you know I'm right. You're telling me if you had the chance...
NATE: I have a girlfriend.
CHUCK: You guys have been dating since kindergarten and you haven't sealed the deal.
NATE: Who says 'seal the seal'?
[Chuck signals Nate that they have arrived at school]
CHUCK: Come on.
[They get up, Dan is standing behind them, Chuck turns to Dan]
CHUCK: You following us or something?
DAN: No, I... I go to your school. Identical uniforms, that's kind of a tip-off?
NATE: That's funny.
[Chuck and Nate leave the bus]
DAN: [to himself] So you guys wanna sit together at lunch? [EXT MET]
[Blair, Isabel and Kati are sitting on the steps looking at the invitations, Jenny is standing next to them]
ISABEL: So cute! They should be framed or something.
BLAIR: Not bad work. And here is yours... as promised.
[Blair hands Jenny one of the invitations]
JENNY: Thanks.
[Serena walks up to them, eating a yogurt]
SERENA: Hey, here you guys are. I looked all over the dining hall for you.
[Serena notices Jenny and shakes her hand]
SERENA: Oh, hi, I'm Serena.
JENNY: I know, uhm, I mean, hi, I'm Jenny.
[Serena picks up one of the invitations]
SERENA: So, when's the party?
BLAIR: Saturday. And you're kinda not invited. Since until 12 hours ago everyone thought you were at boarding school. And Jenny used up all the invites.
JENNY: Uhm, actually...
BLAIR: You can go now.
[Jenny leaves]
BLAIR: Sorry.
SERENA: No, it's ok. I've got a lot of stuff to do anyway.
[Serena throws the invitation onto the steps]
BLAIR: Well, we should get going then. Unless you want us to wait for you. Looks like you got a lot of yogurt left.
SERENA: No, go ahead.
[Blair, Isabel and Kati walk away, Serena turns around]
SERENA: Blair, think we can meet tonight?
BLAIR: I'd love to but I'm doing something with Nate tonight.
SERENA: The Palace, 8 o'clock. Nate will wait.
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over) Spotted - At the steps of the Met, an S and B power struggle.
BLAIR: I can probably do a half hour.
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over): Did S think she could waltz home and things would be just like they were?
SERENA: Thanks for making the time.
BLAIR: Your my best friend.
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over): Did B think S would go down without a fight? Or can these two hotties work it out? There's nothing 'Gossip Girl' likes more than a good catfight. And this could be a cla**ic. [EXT NEW YORK CITY]
[Rufus is putting up flyers for a concert of his band 'Lincoln Hawk', Dan is with him]
DAN: Uh, you know... you know, dad, there's this thing called 'Myspace' where you post all this information online. Save some trees, have a blog.
RUFUS: Maybe if musicians would get off their blogs and picked up their guitars then the music business would be in better shape.
DAN: Ok, like a true relic.
RUFUS: Thanks, son.
[Dan's cell phone rings, he takes a look at the new text
message: Jenny (Mobile), Sep 24, 2007, 3:15:23 PM, HELP: EMERGENCY. 712 5TH AVE.]
DAN: Hey dad, listen, uhm, I got to run. You'll be ok?
RUFUS: Yeah. You'll mom will be back. She's always been a free spirit. That's one of the reasons I fell for her in the first place.
DAN: I meant with the flyers.
RUFUS: Luckily, staple guns are old-school. Go, I'm gonna be fine. [INT OSTROFF CENTER - ERIK'S ROOM]
[Serena walks in]
SERENA: I talked to the nurse and I'm kidnapping you.
ERIK: We're going shopping, aren't we.
SERENA: We're going to Wendell's... just for an hour though, I swear. I had a really bad day.
ERIK: Really? 'Cause I had a great day: A couple of pills, bunch of Rorschach tests... they had this green jelly for lunch.
SERENA: Mmh, yummy! Why didn't you save me any? Come on, we need to get you out of here before mom shows up. [INT WENDELLS - DEPARTMENT STORE]
[Dan walks up to Jenny who's trying on a red dress]
DAN: Jenny, what is it? What is wrong?
JENNY: Do you like this on me?
DAN: Wait... wait a second, is that why you needed me? I thought this was an emergency.
JENNY: A fashion emergency. I mean, come on, I've never been to a big dance before.
DAN: Neither have I.
JENNY: Yeah, but mom's gone and dad's allergic to department stores.
DAN: Well, you look good, Jen. You do, really.
JENNY: Thanks. I'm mean, too bad it's more than our rent but I think I can sew something like it.
[Jenny notices Serena and Erik walking towards them]
JENNY: Oh my gosh, it's Serena. Hi, Serena!
[Jenny takes an invitation addressed to 'Serena van der Woodsen' out of her bag, Dan panics and vanishes]
SERENA: Hey. Hey, Jenny, right?
JENNY: Yeah.
SERENA: This is my...
ERIK: Stylist and personal shopper. Erik, hi.
JENNY: Hi, uhm, this is my brother... or...
[Jenny gestures behind her, notices Dan is gone, Dan is hiding behind a rack of dresses, watching Serena]
SERENA: So is this your dress for the 'Kiss On The Lips' party?
JENNY: Sort of. Speaking of that.
[Jenny gives Serena the invitation]
JENNY: Here, I made you one during free period but anyone asks where you got it, I know nothing.
SERENA: Thanks.
[Serena and Erik walk away]
JENNY: Dan, Dan?
[Serena turns around]
SERENA: Jenny, that dress would look even better in black.
JENNY: Black. Cool. Thanks. [EXT NEW YORK - PARK]
[Chuck and Nate are taking a walk, smoking a Joint]
CHUCK: This is some good stuff.
NATE: Yeah, I'm gonna need it. Blair's mom's at the country house.
CHUCK: Yeah? Then maybe I should swipe some of my dad's viagra? Or my mom's paxils? Nathaniel, you're finally about to have s** with your girlfriend. It's like you're heading to your execution.
NATE: No, man. I'm good.
CHUCK: Talk to Chuck, buddy. You and Blair have been dating forever, all of a sudden there is a problem?
NATE: There is no problem. It's just... do you ever feel like our whole lives have been planned out for us? That we're just gonna... end up like our parents?
CHUCK: Man, that's a dark thought.
NATE: You know, aren't we entitled to choose... just to be happy?
CHUCK: Look, easy, Socrates. What we're entitled to is a trust fund... maybe a house in the Hamptons, a prescription drug problem. Happiness does not seem to be on the menu. So smoke up and seal the deal with Blair... 'cause you're also entitled to tap that a**. [INT THE PALACE HOTEL - BAR]
[Serena and Blair are sitting at the bar, Blair is drinking a Martini]
SERENA: So, how's your mom doing... with the divorce and everything?
BLAIR: Great. So my dad left her for another man. She's lost 15 pounds, got an eye-lift. It's been good for her.
SERENA: I'm really sorry.
BLAIR: Yeah, I could tell since you didn't call or write the entire time it was happening.
SERENA: No, I know... I was just... boarding school... it's like...
BLAIR: I don't even know why you went to boarding school to begin with. Do you know how it felt, calling your house when you didn't show up at school and having your mom say: Serena didn't tell you that she moved to Connecticut?
SERENA: I just... I had to go. I needed to get away from everything. Please just trust me.
BLAIR: How can I trust you when I feel like I don't even know you.
SERENA: Let's fix that. I saw you at school with Kati and Is and I get it. I don't want to take any of that away from you. I just...
BLAIR: Because it's just yours to take if you want it?
SERENA: No, that's not what I mean. I... I miss you. I just want things to go back to the way they used to be. You know, walking to school together, dancing on tables at Bungalow, the nights when we were at your mom's country house. You were like my sister... and with our families... we need each other.
BLAIR: Well, you missed some cla**ic Eleanor Waldorf meltdowns. If it wasn't such a tragedy it would have been funny. Actually kinda was.
SERENA: Well, I wish I could have been there.
BLAIR: You are now. I have to meet Nate. I kind of have something special and...
SERENA: Well, I don't want to keep you but...
[Serena hugs Blair]
SERENA: I love you, B.
BLAIR: I love you too, S.
[Blair leaves]
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over): Spotted - At The Palace Hotel, S and B having a heart to heart.
[Serena takes Blair's left over Martini and empties it in one gulp]
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over): Hmm, why so thirsty, S? You may have won over B for now but we still think you're hiding something. [INT HOME OF THE HUMPHREYS - JENNY'S ROOM]
[Jenny is sitting at the sewing machine, Dan enters]
DAN: Hey!
JENNY: Ah, the invisible man returns. You know, I really had no idea you could move that fast.
DAN: Yeah, well, your fashion emergency was solved, so... I figured my work was done.
JENNY: Come on, Dan. Serena said hi to you at her 9th grade birthday party and you've never forgotten it.
DAN: How could I? She was the only person who spoke to me. And I'm pretty sure she thought I was someone else.
JENNY: Well, you know, she is actually nice. And if she did know you I think she would really like you.
DAN: I don't know, I think she would be a tad overwhelmed by the glitz and the glamour of the Humphrey lifestyle.
JENNY: Well, I heard she's living at The Palace Hotel.
DAN: Well, my point exactly.
JENNY: Probably sitting at the bar by herself, sipping Martinis... all alone. You know, it's actually kinda sad. Oh, and dad's at the gallery working late. He left money for dinner, so I was thinking Indian.
DAN: You know... you know what, I think I'm... I'm gonna go out.
[Dan leaves]
JENNY: Ok... good, 'cause I already ordered and only got enough for one. [INT THE PALACE HOTEL - BAR]
[Chuck enters, shoves some women aside]
CHUCK: Hello, please.
[Chuck walks over to Serena who is having another Martini]
CHUCK: I love this town. I'm going to have to tell my parents the hotel they just bought is serving minors.
SERENA: And if you get a drink they are also serving pigs.
CHUCK: I love it when you talk dirty.
SERENA: You just love when a girl talks to you.
CHUCK: Actually, I prefer them when they're not talking.
SERENA: Oh, I've missed your witty banter.
CHUCK: Let's catch up. Take our clothes off, stare at each other.
SERENA: What about I just get a bit to eat. I've been drinking on an empty stomach.
CHUCK: I heard you didn't do that anymore.
SERENA: Special occasion.
CHUCK: Well, what about a grilled cheese with truffle oil? You do love truffles?
SERENA: Enough to know it's not on the menu.
CHUCK: But then I'm connected.
SERENA: Only because I'm hungry. [INT HOME OF THE WALDORFS - BLAIR'S BEDROOM]
[The room is lit by candles, Nate enters, Blair is waiting for him in lingerie]
NATE: Wow.
BLAIR: Hi.
NATE: Hi.
BLAIR: Is it too much? I wanted it to be special.
[Blair kisses Nate but he pulls away]
BLAIR: What's wrong?
NATE: Look, I don't know how to say this... or if it's even the right thing to do but ehm... there's something I need to tell you. [INT THE PALACE HOTEL - KITCHEN]
[Chuck puts a bundle of dollar bills into the jacket of the chef, Alfonso, and his staff leave]
CHUCK: Alfonso, you're stud. Now have good night, we're closing the kitchen early.
SERENA: Oh my god, this is so good.
CHUCK: Well, if you're looking for a way to thank me I've got a couple ideas.
SERENA: It's a sandwich, Chuck.
[Chuck touches Serena's thigh and leans in on her]
SERENA: This is... this is not happening right now.
CHUCK: You're worried Nate will find out?
SERENA: What?
CHUCK: Last year... the Sheppard wedding... think I don't know why you left town? [FLASHBACK - ONE YEAR AGO - INT BAR]
[Serena is dancing on the bar, holding a bottle of champagne, Nate tries to stop her]
NATE: Serena, you are not supposed to be here.
SERENA: Oh well, if the happy couple didn't want to put up a catch for the bar they should let me be where I want to be. Move!
NATE: Let me see it!
SERENA: No, make me!
NATE: I can do it, I can open it. Let me show you... here, come here. Let me see...
SERENA: No!
NATE: Let me... stop?
[They both pull on the bottle until it opens with a loud bang]
SERENA: Nate!
NATE: That never happens to me.
SERENA: It's ok. You're stronger than me, alright.
NATE: Come here.
SERENA: Look at you, you're a mess.
NATE: So are you.
[Serena and Nate are about to kiss] [INT BLAIR'S BEDROOM - Nate turns his face away from Blair]
BLAIR: But... that was it... you guys kissed.
[Nate shakes his head] [FLASHBACK - ONE YEAR AGO - INT BAR]
[Serena and Nate make out heavily, undressing each other, Chuck watches from the balcony] [INT THE PALACE HOTEL - KITCHEN]
CHUCK: Best friend and the boyfriend. That's pretty cla**y, S. I think you're more like me than you admit.
SERENA: No, no, that... that was then. I'm trying to change.
CHUCK: I liked you better before.
[Chuck tries to kiss Serena, she pushes him away]
SERENA: Stop it. Stop! No! Stop it! [FLASHBACK - ONE YEAR AGO - INT BAR]
[Serena and Nate are having s**, Serena is gasping loudly] [INT BLAIR'S BEDROOM]
[Blair pushes Nate away]
BLAIR: I knew it! I always knew there was something! Get out! [FLASHBACK - ONE YEAR AGO - INT BAR]
[Serena is sitting on top of Nate, riding him] [INT THE PALACE HOTEL - KITCHEN]
[Chuck violently tries to kiss Serena]
SERENA: Chuck, no! [FLASHBACK - ONE YEAR AGO - INT BAR]
[Serena and Nate make out heavily] [INT BLAIR'S BEDROOM]
[Blair falls onto her bed and starts crying] [FLASHBACK - ONE YEAR AGO - INT BAR]
[Nate kisses Serena's breasts] [INT BLAIR'S BEDROOM]
[Blair cries] [INT THE PALACE HOTEL - KITCHEN]
[Chuck is still trying to kiss Serena]
SERENA: Get off of me!
[Serena kicks Chuck between the legs and storms off] [INT THE PALACE HOTEL - BAR]
[Dan looks around the bar for Serena, she enters the bar and crashes into him, her purse flies to the ground, Dan helps her to pick up her things]
DAN: I'm... so sorry, Are you ok?
[Serena takes her purse and runs off, Dan finds her cell phone on the floor and tries to tell Serena but she is already gone]
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over): And just when B and S had built a bridge... it all had to come crashing down. But dry your eyes: the 'Kiss On The Lips' party is around the corner. And you know who loves parties? Gossip Girl. [EXT - NEW YORK - PARK]
[Nate and his father are having a race, Howie wins]
HOWIE: Nice try, son.
NATE: Maybe next time.
HOWIE: You seem upbeat this morning. Did you have fun with Blair last night?
NATE: Actually, we got into a pretty big fight.
HOWIE: You want my advice? Apologize. Even if it was her fault. Flowers, maybe some j**ellery if she's really upset. Always works for your mother.
NATE: I don't know. I think it may be for the best.
HOWIE: Wait a minute, you guys broke up?
NATE: Yeah, I guess we did.
HOWIE: Blair is a great girl.
NATE: I know. But I'm just not sure if she's the girl for me.
HOWIE: But you guys have been dating since kindergarten.
NATE: So I keep hearing.
HOWIE: I mean, you love her, don't you?
NATE: Yes, I do. I just think it might be good for us to take a break, you know.
HOWIE: Maybe not right now. Eleanor Waldorf is gearing up to take her company public and I've been cording her for a month to let me handle the deal.
NATE: Then you should get it.
HOWIE: I will get it... if you just help me out a little bit.
[Nate looks at his father in disbelief]
HOWIE: What? You love her, she loves you. It's just a rough patch, that's all. You don't give up just because things are hard. Not in business or if your family is depending on you. [INT - THE PALACE HOTEL]
[Dan is standing at the reception talking to the Concierge who is holding Serena's cell phone]
CONCIERGE: How did you know it was Miss van der Woodsen if you didn't read it, and if you are not a guest at the hotel what were you doing there?
DAN: What? Uhm, look, when Prince Charming found Cinderella's slipper they didn't accuse him of having a foot-fetish.
CONCIERGE: And you are Prince Charming? Well, there is Miss van der Woodsen now...
DAN: No, no, no, no...
CONCIERGE: Serena!
[Serena turns around and walks over to the reception]
DAN: Don't, don't...
CONCIERGE: Do you know this young man?
DAN: She doesn't know me. Nobody knows me. It's cool, it's fine.
SERENA: Uhm, from last night, right? I'm sorry about that.
DAN: You remember me?
[Dan turns back to the Concierge]
DAN: She remembers me.
CONCIERGE: Well, he claims he found your cell phone.
SERENA: Oh, you found it.
[Lily walks over, carrying a clothes bag]
SERENA: Hey, mom.
LILY: Guess what I found for you... a dress for 'Kiss On The Lips'. I saw the invitation on the nightstand.
SERENA: Oh, uhm, I'm not going to that.
LILY: What do you mean? Blair's throwing it.
SERENA: Yeah, uhm... see the problem is I... by the time I got the invitation... I uhm, actually already had plans.
LILY: Plans with whom?
SERENA: My friend.
DAN: Eh, yeah, hi, nice to meet you Misses van der Woodsen. I'm Dan... Humphrey.
LILY: What are you and Dan Humphrey doing?
SERENA: We... uhm...
[Dan shows Lily a flyer for his dad's concert]
DAN: Eh, we're going to a concert tonight.
LILY: Lincoln Hawk?
DAN: Yeah, 'Rolling Stone' named them one of the 'Top 10 Forgotten Bands Of The '90s'.
SERENA: Whooh! I'm a huge fan.
DAN: Uh-hum.
LILY: Well, this party would have been the perfect opportunity for you to announce your return but I guess I'll just keep the dress for myself.
[Lily walks off]
SERENA: Thank you.
DAN: Yeah, no, I... it's not a problem, really.
[Dan starts walking off]
SERENA: So pick me up at eight?
DAN: You really go out with some guy you don't know?
SERENA: Well, you can't be worse than the guys I do know. [INT JAPANESE RESTAURANT]
[Blair and Nate are having dinner]
NATE: Thanks for meeting me. Look, Blair, I really hurt you and I know that and I want to fix it.
BLAIR: Really? And how are you gonna do that?
NATE: I'm gonna put everything in the past. I'm not gonna see Serena again or even talk to her. It'll be like she doesn't exist.
BLAIR: I think that's a good idea. Let's not mention it again. You gonna eat that?
[Blair picks up a piece of sushi from Nate's plate]
NATE: That's it? 'Cause you were pretty upset last night... I mean, should we talk about this?
BLAIR: There is nothing to talk about. I overreacted... you say it's in the past, it's in the past. I'm sure you have no feelings for her anymore. I just feel bad for Serena... she'll really miss you. What time does the limo come?
NATE: Eight.
BLAIR: Perfect. [INT THE HUMPHREY'S ART GALLERY]
[Rufus is working, Lily walks in]
RUFUS: Lily! Are you shopping for some more art to match your furniture?
LILY: Why is my daughter going to one of your concerts?
RUFUS: 'Cause we're awesome.
LILY: With your son?
RUFUS: Dan's got a date with Serena?
LILY: Hmm.
RUFUS: Well, our kids were bound to meet, it's a small island.
LILY: You're sure it's not some ploy you're using with my daughter to get to me? Now that your wife left you?
RUFUS: How do you know about Alison?
LILY: Like you said: Small island.
RUFUS: Oh, I get it: You hear about Alison, use your daughter as an excuse to start something.
LILY: Yeah, in your dream!
RUFUS: Well, you are in my dreams, Lily... and one of them particular occurs finding you in the back of a Nine Inch Nails bus with your shoes in your earrings and Trent Reznor... oh, that happened!
LILY: No need to rehash details of decades pa**. So I moved on.
RUFUS: Yeah, from Chanterlane to Paris until you switched up rock stars for billionaires.
LILY: You think you're so cute. Washed up band, crappy so-called 'art gallery'.
RUFUS: Well, not all of us have settlements from multiple divorces to sustain us.
LILY: Just stay out of my life, Rufus! [INT HOME OF THE HUMPHREYS]
[Jenny and Dan are standing in front of a mirror, getting ready to go out]
JENNY: You're going out with Serena and I'm going to 'Kiss On The Lips'. Who said this family wasn't cool.
DAN: Well, listen, I don't want to be late but you're looking great.
JENNY: Same.
[Dan leaves, Rufus comes home, they pa** in the hallway]
DAN: See you at the concert, right dad.
RUFUS: I, uhm... ok.
[Rufus sees Jenny and walks over to her]
RUFUS: Oh my god, my daughter is a woman.
JENNY: Dad, you could just tell me I look nice instead of turning this into a sermon on the pa**age of time.
RUFUS: You look like... your mother.
JENNY: Thanks. [INT BLAIR'S BEDROOM]
[Blair is looking at herself in a full-length mirror, she's wearing a brown dress, Eleanor enters]
ELEANOR: Blair. Let me see how it looks! Why are you wearing that one? Didn't you see the dress I left on the bed?
BLAIR: I like this one.
ELEANOR: This one is not as elegant a choice as that one.
BLAIR: Why do you care so much?
ELEANOR: Because I love you. Blair, you will never be more beautiful or thin or happy than you are right now. I just want you to make the most of it.
BLAIR: I guess I have time to change.
ELEANOR: And put some product in your hair. The ends are dry. [INT LIMOUSINE]
[Blair, Nate, Chuck, Isabel and Kati are laughing and drinking champagne] [INT THE PALACE HOTEL]
[Dan enters and sees Serena standing on the gallery, they look at each other and smile] [INT 'KISS ON THE LIPS' PARTY]
[Chuck, Isabel and Kati are standing at the bar, Chuck spots Jenny in the crowd]
CHUCK: Who's the newbie?
KATI: Jenny Humphrey. She's a freshman.
CHUCK: I love freshman. They're so...
ISABEL: ...fresh?
CHUCK: Anything about her on 'Gossip Girl'?
ISABEL: No. Mmh... till you're done with her.
[Chuck walks over to Jenny]
CHUCK: Hi, I'm Chuck.
JENNY: I know, uhm, I mean, hi, I'm Jenny.
CHUCK: It's nice to meet you.
JENNY: You too.
CHUCK: Thank you.
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over): Looks like little Jen might end up with a new boy and a ticket to the inner circle. Or will C end up with another victim? I told you I love parties. [EXT NEW YORK CITY]
[Serena and Dan are walking down the street towards the back entrance of a club, the band is unloading their equipment]
SERENA: So I'm a little overdressed, aren't I?
DAN: Honestly, I don't really have a problem with your appearance. Hey, come on, I want you to meet one of the guys in the band.
SERENA: Oh, so you're a groupie?
DAN: Well, not quite.
[Dan leads Serena to Rufus]
DAN: Serena, I'd like you to meet Rufus Humphrey. Dad, this is Serena.
RUFUS: Serena van der Woodsen. Oh, I don't know how I know that. Nice to meet you.
SERENA: Nice to meet you too.
RUFUS: You guys are a little early. It's gonna be a while before we take the stage.
DAN: Yeah, I may have slightly over-budgeted it for travel time.
[One of Rufus' band-mates holds Rufus' guitar into the air]
RUFUS' BAND-MATE: Hey!
RUFUS: I should go tune that. Excuse me. Enjoy the show! Son, talk to you later.
[Rufus leaves]
DAN: Yeah, see you.
SERENA: So you took me to meet your dad on our first date?
DAN: So this... this is a date? Ah, maybe I should have worn my loafers then... and dress down a little bit. [INT 'KISS ON THE LIPS' PARTY]
[Chuck leads Jenny upstairs]
CHUCK: Let's go and talk some in private.
JENNY: Ok.
[They stop in the empty stairway]
JENNY: This is definitely quieter but do you actually know where we're going or...
CHUCK: Here looks pretty good.
[Chuck leans in to kiss Jenny but she pulls away]
JENNY: So, you said you wanted to talk. Uhm, what do you want to talk about?
CHUCK: How into you I am.
[Chuck starts kissing Jenny but after a few moments she pulls away again]
CHUCK: Ok, I am sorry. If you don't want to do anything that's cool. Let's start over.
JENNY: Yeah, uhm... do you wanna start over back at the party?
CHUCK: Eh... have a gla** of champagne, please?
JENNY: Maybe one.
[While Chuck pours a gla** of champagne, Jenny takes out her cell phone and starts texting] [EXT CLUB]
[Serena and Dan leave the club, Dan holds the door open for her]
SERENA: Thanks.
[Dan stares at Serena]
SERENA: What?
DAN: Sorry, nothing, nothing. I just, uhm... my sister was right: You're nice.
SERENA: You asked my out on a date and you didn't think I was nice?
DAN: No, uh... I just thought you were hot. And technically, you asked me out.
SERENA: Oh, ok, ok, I see. So, uhm, sensible tortured soul boy is actually kind of superficial.
DAN: Yeah, just a little bit.
SERENA: Good to know.
[Dan's cell phone rings, he takes a look at the new text message: Jenny (Mobile), Sep 25, 2007, 9:15:05 PM, HELP. EMERGENCY. NEED YOU, J.]
DAN: Sorry.
[Dan gets another text message: Jenny (Mobile), Sep 25, 2007, 9:15:44 PM, 911, 4 REAL PLEASE. U KNOW Chuck?]
SERENA: Got a better offer?
DAN: No, it's my sister. She's at that 'Kiss On The Lips' party, you know. She's having some problems with that guy Chuck. I'm sorry, I have to go.
SERENA: I'll go with you.
DAN: No, really, that's ok.
SERENA: No, no, listen, if it's Chuck it's not ok. [INT 'KISS ON THE LIPS' PARTY]
[Dan and Serena enter]
DAN: I'm gonna do a lap, ok? Look for her.
SERENA: Yeah, ok.
[The guests notice Serena and start gossiping]
PARTY GUESTS: ... Serena... it's Serena... oh my gosh... is she really here?... is that really her?... Blair said she wasn't invited... she is wasted... she is so brave...
[Isabel and Kati both get new text messages]
ISABEL and KATI: Serena's here?
BLAIR: What is she doing here? She wasn't invited.
[Blair makes her way through the crowd towards Serena but Nate stops her]
NATE: Blair, come on, are you really gonna kick her out?
BLAIR: Did you invite her?
NATE: What? No! God! I told you.
BLAIR: Do not talk to her.
NATE: I was going for a walk.
[Nate pa**es Serena without looking at her, Serena turns around and stares at Blair] [EXT ROOF TOP]
[Chuck tries to kiss Jenny against her will]
JENNY: No!
CHUCK: Quiet.
JENNY: Stop! [INT 'KISS ON THE LIPS' PARTY]
[Serena finds Dan]
SERENA: Hey, no luck?
DAN: No, I haven't seen here anywhere.
SERENA: Come on, let's try upstairs.
[They go upstairs]
DAN: There isn't going to be anybody up here. This is pointless.
[Serena finds a scarf on the floor]
SERENA: Dan!
DAN: What?
SERENA: That's Chuck's scarf.
DAN: Oh god! [EXT ROOF TOP]
[Chuck is still trying to kiss Jenny, Dan runs over to them]
JENNY: Get off. Stop!
DAN: Hey, Jenny!
SERENA: Chuck! Get off of here!
[Chuck lets Jenny go, Dan hugs her]
DAN: Are you ok?
[Dan walks over to Chuck who pushes him away]
DAN: Son of a...
CHUCK: What the hell is your problem? It's a party. Things happen. Who are you anyway?
DAN: How many times do I have to tell you? I'm in your cla**. My name is Dan Humphrey... and that is my little sister!
[Dan punches Chuck in the face, Chuck's nose is bleeding]
SERENA: Let's go. come on.
[Serena pushes Chuck]
SERENA: Chuck, don't you ever touch her again!
CHUCK: Hey, you're life is over, s*ut! Don't forget: I know everything! [INT 'KISS ON THE LIPS' PARTY]
[Blair watches Serena, Dan and Jenny leaving]
DAN: You sure you're ok?
JENNY: Yeah, I will be. Just take me home, ok?
[They step outside]
DAN: So, think I've got a shot at a second date?
SERENA: Well, I don't think we can top this one.
DAN: I did punch someone.
SERENA: True, we talk about it in the cab.
[They get into the cab, Nate watches them leave, Blair and Chuck stand outside too]
BLAIR: She better not show her face again.
CHUCK: I'm actually hoping she will.
[INT CAB - Dan hugs Jenny, then looks at Serena who smiles at him, Serena turns and looks out of the side window]
GOSSIP GIRL (Voice Over): Spotted - Serena... making an heroic exit from B's party. Too bad for her there's school on Monday. So, until next time. You know you love me... Gossip Girl. END OF EPISODE