[Beanie man]
(Silent night riff...)
[Intro]
I am a Claus
I am a Claus
I am a Claus
[Hook]
I am a Claus
Hurry up with my damn rudolph
Hurry up with them trains & dolls
Get the Sleigh out the damn garage
I am a Claus
Even though I'm a Santa Claus
Your wish list in the hands of Claus
So y'all better quit writin' to Claus
[Verse 1]
Naughty or nice is so unlike you
Kissin' santa's a** is so unlike you
The only santa that's not a white dude
So here's a few hating-a** children who'll fight you
If you were milk n cookies I wouldbite you
And I don't even wanna hear 'bout what children might do
Old parents mentally still in high school
Since the white beard they never liked you
Red-a** jacket with a f**ing knapsack
But everybody know you brought real gifts back
Gifts was unwrapped, man, we the Wrap Pack
Dasher Dancer Donner Sleighback
Rudolph Reinder, Red Nose shining
Monop' in this b**h again, Milton Bradley
Skip this house these kids be bratty
Until the day day stop calling me fatty
[Hook]
I am a Claus
So hurry up with my damn rudolph In a family-a** residaunce
Hurry up with my damn egg nog!
I am a Claus
I am a Claus
I am a Claus
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
[Verse 2]
I just talked to Jesus
He said, "What up, Kreezus?"
I said, "Climbing buildins, trying to gift these childrin"
I know elves bout yay high
Reindeer make dat sleigh fly
Su casa, mi casa
I drink milk the mosta - HO!
I am a Claus
I am a Claus
I am a Claus
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
[Outro: Justin Vernon]
Ain't no way I'm coming to town. I'm a Claus