{Verse 1}
I'll tell you a tale of Nelson
And when his lordship died
From a very honest seamen
Who never ever lied
Oh he called on Captain Hardy
To kiss him 'for he go
He said five years on this same ship
And now he let's me know
{Verse 2}
I like the girls who say they do
I hate the girls who don't
I hate the girls who say they do
And then they say they won't
But all of the girls I like the best
I may be wrong or right
Are the ones who say they never do
But look as though they might
{Verse 3}
Flesh young lad was smoking
Upon the lower deck
The glamorous young clippy
Did grab him by the neck
She said I'll have to throw you off
Or my duty I {?}
Do you want to get me into trouble
He said yes please, after work
{Verse 4}
I'll tell you of my Granddad
Who is ninety six years old
Who cuddled up to Granny
Because he felt the cold
He asked her, how about it
She said, dear go back to sleep
Don't let your mind make appointments
That your body just can't keep