Lord, I quit the drinkin', the smokin' an' the honky-tonk life. The day that a ring an' a preacher made her my wife. Yeah, an' I said: "I do," but I didn't have a clue, How I'd miss all the whiskey an' women. I tried to be true, but it's all I can do, Keepin' up with the Jonesin'. Man, this hectic, domestic lifestyle takes a while to adjust. Ah, she don't seem to remember that old rowdy rambler I was. 'Cause she calls up her friends an' tells them, How good I been doin'. But the truth is I'm goin' out of my mind, Keepin' up with the Jonesin'. An' I miss gettin' high, an' stayin out all night, With all my old friends.
An' I miss the liquor, the bartenders, The fights, the girls an' the bands. It wouldn't be so damned hard, If I didn't know what I'm missin'. She don't understand, I'm doin' all that I can, Keepin' up with the Jonesin'. Yeah, tell me what you know about it, possum. Whoa it gets so hard when I know what I'm missin'. Sometimes I give in, start over again, Keepin' up with the Jonesin'. Son, I understand, it's a helluva man, Keepin' up with the Jonesin'. Aw man, Thank you Mr Jones, I sure 'nough appreciate the ride. Hey is this, this a new tractor. That a satellite radio, air-conditioning, heater. Oh, a cooler.