[Sang by Scroda Moon, The Toilet, Oderus Urungus, Slymenstra Hymen, and Beefcake The Mighty]
[Scroda:]
GWAR, I bring forth the portal potty
Coming to feed on the sh** from your bodies.
Your turds have more power than mere human feces
Let's use it's great power to recover the pieces
[The Toilet:]
Hey! Hey jacka**!
Yea You!
You got to love me sooo good!
Yea, yea you can depend on me
Depending on, if my water's on...
if my pipe's unglogged...
Ahhhhh if you're water-logged...
Baby, I am the hole I am your toilet bowl I'll s** your soul
Just pay... just pay my sh**ty toll! ahhhh.
[Scroda:]
Coated in sh** I give all you desire
Mystical doorway swimming in mire
We'll use the plunger if blockage won't budge
It's a door through the plane of fudge
[Oderus:]
So many times I have found you, still I always piss on the ground
Now that I can use you I'm gonna stop f**ing around
If you need sh**, then I got sh**
On that you can depend I'll pump your stump,
you f**in' hump, my crappy, crap-caked friend
[All:]
The Portal Potty, a gift from the gods
Let's pay it tribute and bury our wads
[Beefcake:]
I think we know what it's all about.
Jiggle the handle and watch something jump out.
[Slymenstra:]
I am a woman and I have my needs.
You can never really know just where or when I'll bleed
You need my egg, I need your seed
But pray at the altar, the toilet must feed!
[Toilet:]
Yea, I'll bring ya some s**ers for a k**ing spree
Just keep that f**ing tampon away from me.
[Slymenstra:]
Take in this world, it's sooo beautiful...
Filthy humans, you're all so full of it...
That which you can't stand you can't understand
Speak the mystic words and bring forth
a turd you turn around into it and turn over to me.
[Oderus:]
Cross the river, leave the abyss
Give the seat of the toilet a kiss
[Beefcake:]
Each Virgin sacrifice speaks these magic words.
Well, Jiggle the handle, and call forth a turd.
[Toilet:]
Yea! Here it comes baby,
I'm dropping my load
I'm ain't just on it,
I am the commode! Ahhh!
[Scroda:]
The power of the toilet must never be abused
He must be plunged, he must be sponged, or carnage could ensue.
If a dead sheep had clogged him, who knows what could arrive.
Maybe it will bring the Master here, wouldn't that be a surprise!