[Round 1: Caustic]
They said, "This is it Caustic, time for you to get a crazy headline"
Poison Pen was like, "You got Roosevelt"
I said, "Well...maybe next time."
I said, "When is it going down?"
He said, "7/30 is the deadline."
I was like, "Cool that works out perfect since 7:30 is your bedtime."
I'm about to beat Roosevelt worse than his pops when he hold the belt
This is gonna be worse than the time you tried to blow yourself for Show & Tell
You better pray you don't go to jail, they're gonna make you grow a ponytail
You'll get raped up in the holding cell like, "Stop! I'm only 12!"
Ayo, in the O' I took an L to my Philly steak cousin
But it really ain't nothing, this is a PSA
What happens when you cook crack rock with an Easy Bake Oven
So how you gonna talk about moving weight when you grew up upstate, next to the bluest of lakes?
Let's face facts b**h where you live is a f**ing beautiful place
Yo, I'll k** Roose' whole f**ing family, be back in Cali while the body decomposes
Three weeks later you're f**ing neighbors gonna stop and smell the roses/Roose's
[Round 1: Roosevelt]
How you battle a dude named Cadalack and yet you've got the bigger trunk
Yo, I'd put your a** in a body bag but your nose would stop me from zipping up
I mean holy frick- yo how you hold yourself?
Over there looking like Nose-avelt
I mean, it's Kid Caustic
So I'll tie up you and your girl and run home
And beat you to d**h with a rock to k** two birds with one stone
Whoa, threatening cats on Twitter, man you look like a troll
But you standing in my face and well...you look like a troll
Hold up, I want restitution for executing Biggie
So I wire your jaw and send you back to Western Union City
I should have Tube Steak come punch him...in da mouth
Cause I did not pay 450 to come stare at Squidward's house
Popping off sure boy I'll mollywop yours
Give me a bat I'll rip his head off; Ozzy Osbourne
I'll body any cat, and I'ma start with yours
I'll make my cat and your cat fight
But first clip his toenails, then choke him with his own tail and throw him off the roof like, "Oh well"
Then I'll take the elevator down...ding
Uppercut to the ribs, ball of hair he choking
He tried to crawl to the litter box, "Where you going?!"
Then I started spitting on it, had a mean booger so I picked that sh**
Then I wiped my fingers on it
You should work on your presence and speech
Cause the way your'e clenching your teeth makes you sound like Ernie on Sesame Street
[Round 2: Caustic]
It's getting a little late kiddo, I hope your mom packed some PJ's you can sleep in
Just don't leak that he's been drinking
This whole time he's been thinking
It was Seagrams but it was really the denture water that PH keeps his teeth in
And you got ghostwriter rebu*tals but I know everybody that you talk to
I won't name no names, let's just say ghostwriters could come back to haunt you
Now on that principle alone, you should be sent to the office
The first time you played 7 Minutes In Heaven you redecorated the closet
Ayo, your mother's a lazy f**ing b**h who ain't got nothing to do
As a baby she used to have daydreams about smothering you
You be acting like half your life you were f**ing abused
Just for kicks your dad's dick was kid tested and mother approved
You can't call me a "f*ggot" you f*ggot, don't you know who Caustic is?
C'mon Roose' you put the f**ing "pos" in HIV positive
[Round 2: Roosevelt]
Look, it's a bird, it's a plane...nope...nope...it's a bird
Yo, see I could take your easy approach and break down people with jokes
So watch this heckler ruin this comedian's show
You angry influence? Please
You live in a place with nice schools and trees
So when I k** him, you'll get sent to a pearly gated community
I'll whop whop I'm sick, you seesaw, put your weak jaw under a fat kid at the seesaw
Your grandmother doesn't make the best meatballs
So f** your Italian pride
I would say you've never handled a crime but I know you're ALWAYS down for whacking a guy
Yo, you've got to at Bada Bing watching freaky models
Cause you're obviously Chris Moltisanti off of The Sopranos
I'm Drago's speed off hollows ain't Apollo Creed with combos
So if Everybody Loves Raymond we could scrap, mono e Romono
[?] me? Not that easy vato
When that ostrich beak's the size of three Aquafina bottles
Age jokes, so Caustic be easy, take your time
And when I tell you to be Eazy, that means go catch AIDS and die
Shout out to [?] this guy hasn't paid
You're broke, you have financial AIDS
Cause you're a nerd, cadence waste so no composure with words
Got turned down by F.L.O. cause he ain't know who you were
Started talking sh** on the net like, "He's horrible yo"
Not surprising cause you've always had a problem with flow
[Round 3: Caustic]
Yo, when you rhyming it's hard to laugh cause you talking a lot
And judging by his bling and that outfit, child support is not something you got
Hold up, I'm sorry ahead of time
I heard there was a Grind Time East Coast gang bang
Starring your moms
Featuring Poison Pen, Dutch Vega, followed by Khan
Now, it could just be a rumor I mean I'm probably wrong
But why the f** else would they call that b**h Swallow Da Don
Aye, Troy Brown tried to f** her but she said she'd rather s** instead
At least I think that's what she said that f**ing s*ut was giving Pumpkin head
Yo, she's a pro from the burbs I think she slurps for the taste
They made her lick s**m off of a plate after they jerked off in her face
Yo, your moms a stripper even Soul Khan tipped her, cash
[?] stashes 20's right next to that little Hitler stash
Yo, even A-Cla** stood up in that dumb b**h once
With the length and fury of a one inch punch
At the end of the line, Amzilla played Rock, Paper, Scissor with Cobra Ky
All the meanwhile Sara Connor banged your sister...from behind
The moral of the story is, after so many brothers spending the night
There's no mystery to anyone in this room why you have so much trouble accepting that you're white
So keep on questioning life and don't play with me rookie
I'll have your mom baking me cookies while she plays with her p**y
[Round 3: Roosevelt]
He bites Madness and Frank Stacks
But now I gotta start making y'all believe
Because I found out that there's an extra player on the team
See Fredo called one of our rappers bragging how he fed him bars to go
Not realizing that there was someone else on the phone
So, you don't take pride in your craft
You just take whatever, paste together
And you're Italian so even with food Alfredo makes it better
I couldn't make any sense of it
Til I realized he's been changing his penmanship
Because they stopped feeding him lines when they see the way he delivers it
Like, "f*ggot", "AIDS", "man penis"
"f** Madness I can't read this!"
Your rhyme style, he's Drew Carry, telling you to rhyme when you hit the stage
And since you're a comedian we're all wondering, Who's Line Is It Anyway?
You talk sh** on your computer but when you're not behind it you seem cool
So what the f**? Somebody ghostwriting your Tweets too?
You dropped the "Kid" out your name before you hit 5-2
Listen Caustic, sh**'s ironic cause the kid is dropping you
After Madness it's battling Grizzle with the tux on
Is when he started to talk to dude
So it only makes sense that this f*ggot follows suit
I hate when you reference all those actors in those movies
You and Fredo writing looks like-
{Gets interrupted by the crowd}
So I'ma body Caustic's a**, leave him in a body bag
At the end of the story, he bites heads like [?]
Cause I'ma end this sh** off with a freestyle
When Poison Pen said, "Yo girls make some noise. He was the first one to scream. 'Owwww.'"