You've all been worshipping a false messiah.
I pray to God that I got here in time to guide you.
I came to bring you hope, I came to bring you joy,
So I've got to stay alive and drunk and unemployed.
I've got to stay alive and drunk and unemployed.
I've GOT TO STAY ALIVE AND DRUNK AND UNEMPLOYED!
Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi, Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi.
I came to destroy all the false piety.
Most of all, the false piety of smug sobriety.
I sneak into town, and I'm gone in a flash,
Spreaking my wisdom around like a rash,
I'm spreading my wisdom around like a rash,
SPREADING MY WISDOM AROUND LIKE A RASH!
Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi, Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi.
Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi, Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi.
I sure hope she's gonna be sympathetic,
'Cause she's a hot little Catholic paramedic.
I've got to leave in the morning, 'cause they're coming to get me,
But first I need you to aid and abet me.
I need you to aid and abet me. I need you to aid and abet me,
I NEED YOU TO AID AND ABET ME!
Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi, Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi.
Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi, Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi.