We've been on a bunch of dates
I weigh debates that this create
I hate that state of forced introspection
We traded wit, we swapped some spit
You fingered me a little bit
But we never really had a connection
You did nothing wrong
I have no excuse
Just my intuition telling me
We shouldn't reproduce
I know I have to end it
But pretend to just suspend it
By pretending that I'm busy all week
I let the foregone linger on
Text back with an emoticon
Withdraw from you by being oblique
Inside I know my tactics just delay it
But I'll do anything so I don't have to say it
I'll draw this out forever like it's Vietnam
then one day I'll be gone like Bambi's mom
(aww)
‘Cause there's the right thing to do
Then there's what I'm gonna do
There's so much I should say but instead
I do the fadeaway
(fadeaway)
Now I'm fading like chalk on a sidewalk
Or the polio virus after Jonas Salk
The erection of a man on antidepressants
The cast of different strokes after adolescence
The Jewish guy in Sizzler on Yom Kippur
The Whig party post Millard Fillmore
Reproductive rights below the Mason Dixon
Native Americans after the barter system
Your thyroid gland after Hashimoto
The family in the Back to the Future photo
Yeah, I fade away
We say that men are a**holes who don't communicate
We revel in our victimhood and amplify our hate
We find ways to be indignant like it's a sport
Then dissect their malignance with the views we distort
The way men break up may be sloppy and terse
What they do is bad but what we do is worse
We pretend to ourselves it's the nice thing to do
To let you down gently by just not f**ing telling you
And deep down we know it's the worst way to play it
But we are what we have
Huge pussies
And women are hypocrites
Especially ones in comedy bands
We see your faults but not our own
Then we wonder why we're all alone
We fill you up with maybes, excuses, and stalls
But like a baby in China
It's better to have balls
(balls)
Not the Good Wife type like Christine Baranski
So I'll pull out and leave like I'm Roman Polanski
(aww)
‘Cause there's the right thing to do
Then there's what I'm gonna do
There's so much I should say but instead
I do the fadeaway
(fadeaway)
Like Verbal Kint fading into Keyser Soze
Rights in Arizona for a guy named Jose
Opportunities for a college grad
The love between your mom and dad
Gonna Peter out like a gay Cetera
Iranian relations since the Reagan era
Black Nike sales after Heaven's Gate
Summer camp attendance at Penn State
The name Adolf after World War II
Like Debbie Gibson's pop career, Out of the Blue
Yeah, I fadeaway
‘Cause I don't wanna get to know you
I just want to blow you
Off