I'm gonna tell you all a story
It's really quite normal
I was taking my crush
To my year 10 formal
She was so pretty
She made my heart melt
When she looked away
I tucked my bo*er in my belt
My suit was real fly
Her dress was quite tidy
But what was on my mind
Was the afterparty
The place was pretty loose
And not a moment too soon
Zack rocked up
With a box of goon
I nodded him over
And asked for advice
And Zach agreed
That tonight was the night
He said "shorty likes you mate
She said you should drink a cup
And sit next to her"
I looked her in the eyes
And I put down my cup
Everybody knew
It was time to hook up up up up up ah
But then she put me in the friendzone
It's not the end though
I'm still having coffee with her Mum
She's gonna call me on the weekend
About a lift home
Or advice from her new man
And I don't care about the shoppin'
Or the facials
As long as she's there with me
And then she put me in the friendzone
It's not the end though
It's not the end though
Now you're gonna hear
Another similar tale
I was in love with this girl
My Holy Grail
It was a girl next door
I've always adored
I'm like Neeson in Taken
If you call her a who*e
(I will find you)
Though she had a boyfriend
We talked all the time
He was just a speed hump
She had to be mine
Then they had a fight
Over his stupid friends
That's oo for me
Cause I don't have any freinds
Their fight was real bad
My chance to make a move
So i bought her a puppy
"Oh bro you're so smooth"
I told her all about
My feelings and sh**
I'm like MC Hammer
My love is too legit to quit
She looked me in the eyes
And she knew what to say
But then she f**ed up
And asked if I was gay
"I thought you were gay"
"You think I'm gay?
Why don't you f** me and find out"
But then she put me in the friendzone
It's not the end though
I'm still having coffee with her Gran
She's gonna call me on the weekend
About a lift home
Or advice from her new man
And I don't care about the pedicures
Or the waxes
As long as she's there with me
And then she put me in the friendzone
It's not the end though
It's not the end though
Our tales aren't unusual
It's happened everywhere
Guys are getting friendzoned
Girls just don't care
Giving a girl flowers
Friendzone
Picking her up from town
Friendzone
Listening to her problems
Friendzone
Drawing her a picture
Friendzone
Eating a banana
Friendzone
Wearing crocs
Friendzone
Watching Magic Mike
Friendzone
Watching her sleep
Friendzone
s**ing a dude's dick
Friendzone
s**ing your own dick
Friendzone
Friendzone
Now I'm older
I'm so bitter and jaded
I've been friendzoned so much
And I've barely been laid
But the other day I met a girl
The prettiest being
She was so nice that she made me
Feel feelings
She bought me a beer
Said "you're the one I want"
And asked would I like to make love to her
All night long
But then I put her in the friendzone
I don't know why though
Cause she was so f**ing hot
And I put on an ugly onesie
We played some Twister
And I f**ing co*k-blocked myself
We ended up watching TV
We had a snuggle
I cried when she went to sleep
Yeah I put her in the friendzone
It is the end though
It is the end though
Yeah I put her in the friendzone
It is the end though
It is the end though