[Intro:]
You f**ing grou...
Pick up the goddamn phone
[Verse 1:]
b**h, where the f** were you Tuesday
With who you say
I wasn't at the studio b**h
What'cha do screw Dre
You went there looking for me
Boo, that excuse is too lame
Keep playing me you're gonna end up with a huge goose egg
You fake, lying s*ut you never told me you knew Drake
And Lupe, you want to lose two legs
You try to flip this on me
If I spent more time with you
You say "okay yeah, I'm cuckoo, hey?"
Well, screw you
And I’d be the third person who screwed you today
Oh, four; Dre, Drake, Lupe -- ooo touché
You were too two-faced for me
Thought you was my number one, true-blue ace but you ain't
And I can see you and you make that little boo-boo face
Cause I'm hanging up this phone boo
You make my f**ing Bluetooth ache
You feeling blue too late, go smurf yourself
You make me wanna smurfin' puke blue Kool Aid
Here's what you say to someone you hate
[Hook:]
My life will be so much better
If you just dropped dead
I was laying in bed last night thinking
And this thought just popped in my head
And I thought, wouldn't sh** just be a lot easier
If you dropped dead
I would feel so much better
[Verse 2:]
Think I just relapsed, this b**h pushed me over the brink
Hop on the freeway tryna get some time alone and just think
Then the cops pulled me over but they let me go
Cause I told 'em I'm only driving drunk, cause that b**h drove me to drink
I'm back on my f** hoes, but a whole new hatred for blondes
But bias? I hate all b**hes the same, baby come on
Excuse the pun but b**h is such a broad statement
And I am channeling my anger through every single station it's on
Cause a woman broke my he-art, I say he-art
Cause you ripped it in two pa-arts, and threw it in the garbage
Who do you think you are, b**h
Guess it's time for me to get the dust off and pick myself up off the carpet
But I'll never say the L-word again, I L-L-L-L... Lesbian
Ahh, I hope you hear this song and go into a cardiac arrest
My life would be so much better if you just
[Hook]
[Bridge:]
Cause you told me, you love me, forever, b**h, that was a lie
Now I never, wanted someone, to die, so bad in my f**ing life
But f** it, there’s other fish in the sea
[Verse 3:]
And I'mma have a whale of a time
Being a single sailor for the night
b**h on a scale of, 1 to 10
sh**, I must be the holy grail of, catches
Ho, I got an Oscar attached to my f**ing name, de la
I might hit the club, find a chick that's tailor made for me
Say f** it, kick some shots back, get hammered and nail her
These b**hes tryna get attached but they're failing to latch onto the tail
Of my bumper they're scratching at the back of my trailer like I'm itching to get hitched
Yeah, I'm rich as a b**h
But b**hes ain't sh**, I'd rather leave a b**h in a ditch
b**h you complain when you listen to this
But you still throw yourself at me
That's what I call pitchin' a b**h
That's why I'm swinging at this chicks on sight
Long as I got a bat and two balls it's foul, but my dick's on strike
So all that love sh** is null and void, b**h I'm a droid
I avoid Cupid, stupid wasn't for bl**jobs you'd be unemployed
Oi-oi-oi, man oh man, your boy-boy-boy's getting sick of these girls-girls-girls
Oink-oink-oink, you f**in' pigs, all you're good for is doink-doink-doink
"I got 99 problems and a b**h ain't one"
She's all 99 of 'em; I need a machine gun
I take 'em all out; I hope you hear this song and go into a cardiac arrest
Have a heart attack and just drop dead
And I'mma throw a f**ing party after this, cause YES
[Hook]
[Outro:]
I'm just playing b**h, you know I love you