Narrator
Meet Eddie, 23 years old
Fed up with life and the way things are going, he decides to rob a liquor store
(I can't take this no more. I can't take it no more, homes.)
But on his way in, he has a sudden change of heart
And suddenly, his conscience comes into play
Dr. Dre
Alright, stop! (Huh?) Now before you walk in the door
Of this liquor store and try to get money out the drawer
You'd better think of the consequence
(But who are you?) I'm your motherf**in' conscience
Eminem
That's nonsense
Go in and gaffle the money and run to one of your aunt's cribs
And borrow a damn dress and one of her blonde wigs. (Can I borrow this?)
Tell her you need a place to stay, you'll be safe for days
If you shave your legs with Renee's razor blades
Dr. Dre
Yeah, but if it all goes through like it's supposed to
The whole neighborhood knows you and they'll expose you
Think about it, before you walk in the door first
Look at the store clerk, she's older then George Burns
Eminem
f** that. Do that sh**. Shoot that b**h
Can you afford to blow this sh**? Are you that rich?
Why you give a f** if she dies? Are you that b**h?
Do you really think she gives a f** if you have kids?
Dr. Dre
Man, don't do it. It's not worth it to risk it. (You're right.)
Not over this sh**. (Stop!)
Drop the biscuit. (I will!)
Don't even listen to Slim, yo. He's bad for you
Eminem
You know what, Dre? I don't like your attitude
(It's all right, c'mon, just come in here for a minute.)
(Mmm, I don't know.)
(Look, baby.)
(Damn!)
(Look, it's gonna be all right, right?)
(Well, okay.)
Narrator
Meet Stan, 21 years old
After meeting a young girl at a rave party
Thing's start getting hot and heavy in an upstairs bedroom
Once again, his conscience comes into play
Eminem
Now listen to me: while you're kissin' her cheek
Smearin' her lipstick
I slip this in her drink
Now all you gotta do is nibble on this little b**h's earlobe...
Dr. Dre
Yo, this girl's only 15 years old
You shouldn't take advantage of her, it's not fair
Eminem
Yo, look at her bush. Does it got hair? (Uh-huh.)
f** this b**h right here on the spot bare
Till she pa**es out and she forgot how she got there
Dr. Dre
Man, ain't you ever seen that one movie Kids?
Eminem
No, but I seen the p**no with Son Doobiest!
Dr. Dre
sh**, you wanna get hauled off to jail?
Eminem
Man, f** that, hit that sh** raw dawg and bail
(Hee. It feels good to be home.)
Narrator
Meet Grady, a 29 year old construction worker
After coming home from a hard day's work
He walks in the door of his trailer park home
To find his wife in bed with another man
(What the f**?!)
(Grady!!)
Dr. Dre
Alright, calm down. Relax, start breathin'
Eminem
f** that sh**, you just caught this b**h cheatin'
While you at work, she's with some dude, tryin' to get off?
f** slittin' her throat! Cut this b**h's head off!!
Dr. Dre
Wait, what if there's an explanation for this sh**?
Eminem
What? She tripped? Fell? Landed on his dick?
Dr. Dre
Alright, Shady
Maybe he's right, Grady
But think about the baby
Before you get all crazy
Eminem
Okay! Thought about it. Still wanna stab her?
Grab her by the throat, get your daughter and kidnap her
That's what I did. Be smart, don't be a retard
You gonna take advice from somebody who slapped Dee Barnes!?
Dr. Dre
What'd you say?
Eminem
What's wrong? Didn't think I'd remember?
Dr. Dre
Imma k** you, motherf**er!
Eminem
Ah-ah, temper, temper!
Mr. Dre? Mr. N.W.A.? Mr. AK
Coming straight outta Compton, y'all better make way?
How in the f** you gonna tell this man not to be violent?
Dr. Dre
'Cuz he don't need to go the same route that I went
Been there, done that
Aw, f** it, what am I sayin'?
Shoot 'em both, Grady, where's your gun at?
*gunshots*