Well old Mr. Johnson
had troubles all his own
He had an old yellow cat
that wouldn't leave home
Tried everything he knew to do
to get the cat to stay away
Even took him up to Canada
and told him for to stay
Chorus:
But the cat came back, the very next day,
Thought he was a goner, but the cat came back
`Cause he wouldn't stay away
Well they give a boy a dollar
for to set the cat afloat
And he took him up the river
in a sack and a boat
Well the fishin' it was fine
till the news got around
That the boat was missing
and the boy was drowned...
Chorus:
Well the farmer on the corner
said he'd shoot him on sight
And he loaded up his gun
full of rocks and dynamite
The gun went off,
heard all over town
Little pieces of the man
was all that they found...
Chorus:
Well they finally found a way
this cat for to fix
They put him in an orange crate
on Route 66
Come a ten ton truck
with a twenty ton load
Scattered pieces of the orange crate
all down the road...
Chorus:
Now they gave him to a man
going up in the balloon
And they told him for to leave him
with the man in the moon
Well the balloon got busted,
back to earth it head,
And seven miles away
they picked the man up dead...
Chorus:
Well they took him to the shop
where the meat was ground
And they dropped him in the hopper
when the butcher wasn't 'round
Well the cat disappeared
with a blood-curdling shriek
And the town's meat
tasted furry for a week...
Chorus:
Well, they took him to Cape Canaveral
and they put him in a place
Shot him in a U.S. rocket
going way out in space
Well they finally thought the cat
was out a' human reach
Next day they got a call
from Miami Beach and...