[Verse 1:]
Rebel or pacifist?
Better or average?
Never or have to?
Forever or past due?
Heaven or back at you?
Weapon or pa**iveness?
Paper or plastic?
Hater or fanatic?
Bow your head and close your eyes
As the hours goin' by, decide if power is even on the line
The powers that be haven't cowered in the least
But my faith looks up to thee
The big She in the sky
One day, it will be She and I
Until then, she cries, "Please decide or I'm leaving"
As I decide whether leaving is a blessing or a boon
Soon is stressful to the groom
Bride don't leave me
But... Your choice miss
You know where my void is
And the voices...
Can't even tell you where the voice is
[Hook:]
If I die tonight
Where will you be?
With a tear in my eye
What will you see?
You don't know the sadness of a joker
You don't know the sadness of a joker
[Verse 2:]
In my bedroom
Re-introducing wrist to knife
Chicks are my kryptonite
Spliffs are my lifted spirit
Seemed like everybody hated the work I put in
Now you waitin' for the goodness I been makin'
What good is it if I die?
Y'all don't know when I cry
My laptop does
That's NOT love
I don't know if I'm a woman or man
Fans pullin' my hands, like "You the man! "
They don't understand
God knows, but she deserted me
Purposefully, I feel my purpose is to believe
But feel worthless
I got a son, in fact; mad kids
But can't react when they askin' where Dad is
That's some shhh
Perfect makes practice
So I hope y'all hear my songs and do back-flips
You wanna watch through my eyes?
But tears are what you laugh with
Where's my bottle of Aspirin?
[Hook:]
If I die tonight
Where will you be?
With a tear in my eye
What will you see?
You don't know the sadness of a joker
You don't know the sadness of a joker
[Verse 3:]
Yo
No more crushes, I fell in love with comic books
Not a good look when reality is the focus
These-
Know what it is, but won't give it up
Corporate foes know I know the biz but won't fold
Normalcy is so important to me
But if u force it, it will force you into morbid dreams
How bout a glimpse into my nightmares?
Sky bright, yeah right
My high is quite fearsome, gruesome
To some, I grew some
I just let the rapist take what they can lose, one
UCK the world, is the whisper
But I love the world, is what was spiked in my plight elixir
So like the swisher, yeah laugh at Mr. Truman
I stay gettin' done dirty, I refuse groomin'
So whose stupid? The song or me living?
Still I k** writtens, I live when I type
Kiss me goodnight
Enjoy my body of work
Boy in the body of a skirt
[Hook:]
If I die tonight
Where will you be?
With a tear in my eye
What will you see?
You don't know the sadness of a joker
You don't know the sadness of a joker
[Outro:]
I smile sometimes...
Sometimes I feel like my old me
My only true fan
So, to all the true fans
I love y'all, sooo much
Hey Alex, it's Charles
Umm...
I heard about what happened
It's umm... kinda messed up how it works
But, I know where you're headed
Ain't nothing but the best waves...
And this should just teach a lesson man
Be proud to be a lesson to all the irresponsibles out there
Life is precious, man
Your family misses you, man
Your dad really misses you
Your friends, brothers, sisters
They really miss you
I saw this video where, uh...
They were looking at the waves, and they were splashing like crazy
Like everybody was just wildin' out
I hope you never had a question about love in your heart
Cause everybody love you
Wish we could've hung out sometime, man
My balance ain't all that great on the surf board
But, you know...
I'm really good at surfing the internet (Hehe)
Charles Hamilton, man
Much love...