[Verse 1: Theresa May]
A new law is here
That causes decent people to live in fear
A new power that allows us to get your browsing history from the internet
Let's not forget this will defect everybody and it will protect nobody that I can inspect anybody who disagrees with me
That's why I want to spy on everyone all the time
Some people say that's fine!
But every time you go on online, every email you sign, I'll be watching you
And my message to the haters, I want your communications data
As our power will extend politicians and their friends
Can be manipulated for their own ends
Every text you send, every facebook friend, I'll be watching you
*Applaud*
[Verse 2: David Cameron]
Can't you see?
Your mobile phones will all belong to me
Everyone you call, anyone at all, every day in every way Theresa May and I will be watching you
We will look after you
*Laughter*
Wherever you turn we will be right behind you
We will not let you live in private
We will use everything at our disposal to find out about you and your family and we will never forget what we find
[Verse 3: Theresa May]
This is my position, I don't need reasonable suspicion
But if you sign online petitions expect the Spanish inquisition
[Verse 4: David Cameron]
Think of your own smartphone, it's no longer under the no-go zone
It's under attack because we will have all the technology you own
What can I see with these new abilities for me?
The answer is straight forward
It's your supermarket rewards and your national health service records
It's all information you give to any corporation
Every conversation in every situation every communication every website you use
Everything you do every day in every way Theresa May and I will be watching you