[Produced By Ben Lloyd & Frank Turner] When I was sixteen I cut myself a Mohawk Because I wanted to walk the walk And not just talk the talk But it was a bit of a disaster because I did the sides with kitchen scissors Because I didn't have any clippers And I didn't want to use a beard-trimmer I'd made that mistake before When you got home you didn't want to talk about what I'd done You said I'd let you down, I'd f**ed around, when I was only having fun With the way that you've been lately, you've no right to scream and shout You and I, we've got a lot that we need to talk about What's the point in making vows that you're never going to keep? A lifetime lying awake means you'll never get to sleep And all the promises you made, that were painful and untrue Of all the things you do they reflect worst on you We all have our own devices For handling mid-life crises Usually involves a motorbike and Suspicious fashion decisions But you choose to stave off grey hairs by Lamely hacking at the sides
With lies and flimsy alibis For your suspicious expeditions When I get home I don't want to talk about what you've done Yes you've let me down, you've f**ed around, but I guess you were having fun With the way that I've been lately, I've no right to scream and shout You and I, we've got a lot that we need to talk about What's the point in making vows that you're never going to keep? A lifetime lying awake means you'll never get to sleep And all the promises you made, that were painful and untrue Of all the things you do they reflect worst on you You always told me Father's Day was just another way Of selling Hallmark greeting cards Twenty years of waking sleep, of lying through your teeth Meant every Father's Day spent wondering who the hell you are What's the point in us making vows that we're never going to keep? I keep trying to keep you up, but you keep on falling asleep And all the promises we made were painful and untrue But for better or for worse, I am turning into you