The SCENE
TheB A R N E T.
The P E R S O N S of the PLAY.
With some short Characterism of the Chief Actors.
Good-stock, the Host (plaid well) alias,
the Lord Frampul. He pretends to be a
Gentleman and a Scholar, neglected by
the Times, turns Host, and keeps an Inn,
the Sign of the Light Heart in Barnet: is supposed
to have one only Son, but is found to have none, but
two Daughters, Frances and Lætitia, who was lost
young, &c.
Lovel.
A compleat Gentleman, a Soldier and a
Scholar, is a melancholy Guest in the Inn: first quar-
rell'd, after much honour'd and belov'd by the Host.
He is known to have been Page to the old Lord Beau-
fort, follow'd him in the French Wars, after a Com-
panion of his Studies, and left Guardian to his Son.
He is a**isted in his Love to the Lady Frampul, by theHost, and the Chambermaid Prudence. He was one that acted well too.
Ferret.
Who is also called Stote and Vermin, isLovel's Servant, a Fellow of a quick nimble Wit,
knows the Manners and Affections of People, and can
make profitable and timely discoveries of them.
Frank.
Suppos'd a Boy, and the Hosts Son, bor-
rowed to be drest for a Lady, and set up as a stale byPrudence, to catch Beaufort or Latimer, proves to
be Lætita, Sister to Frances, and Lord Frampul's
younger Daughter, stoln by a Beggar-woman, shorn,
put into Boys Apparel, sold to the Host, and brought up
by him as his Son.
Nurse.
A poor Chair-woman in the Inn, with one
Eye, that tends the Boy, is thought the Irish Beggar
that sold him, but is truly the Lady Frampul, who left
her home melancholick, and jealous that her Lord lov'd
her not, because she brought him none but Daughters,
and lives unknown to her Husband, as he to her.
Frances.
Supposed the Lady Frampul, being repu-
ted his sole Daughter and Heir, the Barony descend-
ing upon her, is a Lady of great Fortunes, and Beau-
ty, but phantastical: thinks nothing a felicity, but to
have a multitude of Servants, and be call'd Mistress
by them, comes to the Inn to be merry, with a Chamber-
maid only, and her Servants her Guests, &c.
Prudence.
The Chamber-maid is elected Sove-
reign of the Sports in the Inn, Governs all, Commands,
and so orders, as the Lord Latimer is exceedingly ta-
ken with her, and takes her to his Wife, in conclusion.
Lord Latimer and Lord Beaufort, are a pair of
young Lords, Servants and Guests to the Lady Fram-
pul, but as Latimer falls enamour'd of Prudence, so
doth Beaufort on the Boy, the Hosts Son, set up for Læ-
titia, the younger Sister, which she proves to be indeed.
Sir Glorious Tipto.
A Knight, and Colonel, hath
the luck to think well of himself, without a Rival,
talks gloriously of any thing, but very seldom is in the
right. He is the Ladies Guest, and her Servant too;
but this day utterly neglects his Service, or that him.
For he is so enamour'd on the Fly of the Inn, and theMilitia below Stairs, with Hodge Huffle, and Bat
Burst, Guests that come in, and Trundle, Barnabe,
&c. as no other Society relisheth with him.
Fly.
Is the Parasite of the Inn, Visiter general of
the House, one that had been a strolling Gipsee, but
now is reclam'd, to be Inflamer of the Reckonings.
Peirce.
The Drawer, Knighted by the Colonel,
stil'd Sir Pierce, and young Anone, one of the
chief of the Infantry.
Jordan.
The Chamberlain, another of the Militia,
and an Officer, Commands the Tertia of the Beds.
Jug.
The Tapster, a Through-fare of News.
Peck.
The Hostler.
Bat Burst.
A broken Citizen, an in and in Man.
Hodge Huffle.
A Cheater, his Champion.
Nick Stuff.
The Ladies Taylor.
Pinnacia Stuff.
His Wife.
Trundle.
A Coachman.
Barnabe.
A hir'd Coachman.
[Only talk'd on.
Staggers.
The Smith.
Tree.
The Sadler.
The P R O L O G U E.
You are welcome, welcome all to the New Inn;
Though the old House, we hope our Chear will win
Your Acceptaion: we ha' the same Cook
Still, and the fat, who says, you sha' not look
Long for your Bill of Fare, but every Dish
Be serv'd in i' the time, and to your wish:
If any thing be set to a wrong taste,
'Tis not the Meat, there, but the Mouth's displac'd,
Remove but that sick Palate, all is well.
For this, the secure Dresser bad me tell,
Nothing more hurts just Meetings, than a Croud;
Or, when the Expectation's grown too loud:
That the nice Stomach would ha' this or that,
And being ask'd, or urg'd, it knows not what:
When sharp or sweet, have been too much a Feast,
And both out liv'd the Palate of the Guest.
Beware to bring such Appetites to the Stage,
They do confess a weak, sick, queasie Age;
And a shrew'd grudging too of Ignorance,
When Clothes and Faces 'bove the Men advance:
Hear for your Health, then, But at any hand,
Before you judge, vouchsafe to understand,
Concoct, digest: if then, it do not hit,
Some are in a Consumption of Wit,
Deep, he dares say, he will not think, that all --
For Hecticks are not Epidemical.