(Sax intro by Jon Smith) I got my wife a charge card Just the other day I owe five hundred dollars Just for yesterday I said, "Honey, here's a present Go out and shop around, Buy you a couple a-dresses, Browse around downtown" She did just what I told her Bought one, two, three Came home lookin' silly Makin' goo-goo eyes at me Mastercharge, I'll break an' bury her card Mastercharge, I'll break an' bury her card Mastercharge, I'll break an' bury her card Oh yeah, charge it! Said, "Did you get your dress?" "Yes, one or two" I needed me some shoes, I needed some j**elry, too" Two hundred dollar dresses I could-a made, I can't sew It made me so mad I could call her a so and so Mastercharge, I'll break an' bury her card Mastercharge, break an' bury her card Mastercharge, break an' bury her card Oh yeah, charge it for me, charge it, baby! Hey! Ow! For one-a that gal's dresses, yeah I paid one and a half I'm so mad, I just had to laugh I could see in my mind On a horse like Paul Revere Hate to check my mail boxes 'Cause these bills keep comin' here Mastercharge, break an' bury her card Mastercharge, break an' bury her card Mastercharge, break an' bury her card Oh, let's charge it! "Oh, don't get too much on the bill, dear" ("Oh, I put five hundred dollars already, baby")
"Yeah, but I know, but I'm-a, you know that, that, that, 18% is k**in' me!" "Yeah, I understand darlin', but I know you wanna charge it an' everything but, yeah, darlin' " ("They have 'American Express") "But, wait a minute, man, I, I told ya to take that Master Card with ya And take one wit' ya and leave one at home "But you look good in them blue jeans, though" ("Yeah, I understand about dresses") Yeah, they got 'em on sale up there, upside the wall, there" "Fifteen dollars, man, on sale darlin', here, let me look for ya" "I'm gonna bet you, be struttin' down the street in them blue jeans, haha" "Yeah, but you can even wear them dresses on the weekend" "Yeah, I hear ya baby, well charge it then baby, that's alright, yeah" ("I have a Visa"!) "What"? (heh, heh) "Give me the scissors, I'm gonna cut 'em up" Well, you ought to be ashamed of yourself, you!" "Yeah I know, darlin', I am" ("Charge it") "Here, go on charge, darlin' " "I'm guilty callin' em, I know you're gonna charge it anyway" "Ooh, I know you gonna look good in them blue jeans You look like you been poured in 'em"! (Fading) Oh, charge it baby! Yeah, I see you later on, an' hour I'm gone to work here, n' when I come back I wanna see you with them jeans on, baby Yeah, love her, yeah, you look good baby Yeah, I know, I know... (fades out to end)