This excerpt is from pages 82-85 of the Humphrey Davies translation of Alaa Al Aswany's novel The Yacoubian Building. The corresponding scene from The Yacoubian Building movie is here.
Hagg Azzam was well aware of all this and so as soon as he decided to put himself forward as a candidate in the elections for the People's Assembly he sought an appointment with Kamal el Fouli, who kept him waiting for a few weeks, then finally gave him one at the office of his son, the lawyer Ya**er el Fouli, on Shihab Street in El Mohandiseen. After Friday prayers, Hagg Azzam and his son Fawzi went to the appointment. The office was empty except for security staff, Kamal el Fouli, and his son.
Azzam and El Fouli embraced and exchanged prayers, compliments, and jokes, and one might have been forgiven for thinking the two were old friends who loved, understood, and respected each other.
After a long conversation ranging over a number of topics byway of preparation, Azzam broached the subject. He spoke of how he loved the people and of his desire to serve them, quoting more than one of the Prophet's noble hadiths concerning the rewards waiting for those who strive to meet the needs of the m**ms, Kamal el Fouli nodding in agreement. Finally Azzam came to the critical point. He said, "This is why I have sought God's guidance, placed my trust in Him, and decided, God willing, to put myself forward as a candidate in the coming elections for my constituency, Kasr el Nil. I hope that the Patriotic Party will agree to nominate me and I'm yours to command, Kamal Bey, for anything you may need."
El Fouli made a show of thinking deeply, even though he had been expecting Azzam to say this.
El Fouli made contradictory impressions on people who saw him. There were his intelligence, quick-wittedness, and overwhelming presence on the one side and on the other his corpulent body, his sagging belly, his always slightly loosened neck tie, the hideous, mismatched colors of his clothes, his crudely dyed hair, his coarse, fat face, his lying, vicious, impertinent looks, and his plebeian manner of speaking, when
he would stretch his arms out in front of him, waggling his fingers and shaking his shoulders and belly as he talked, like a woman of the lower cla**es.
All the preceding gave him a somewhat comic appearance, as though he were putting on a turn for the amusement of the bystanders. It also left one with an unpleasant feeling of vulgarity. El Fouli asked his helpers for pen and paper. Then he started to draw and for a few moments was so absorbed in his task that Hagg Azzam thought that something was wrong. El Fouli soon finished, however, and turned the piece of paper towardAzzam, who was astonished to see that the drawing represented a large rabbit. He said nothing for a moment, then asked him in an amicable way, "I don't understand what you mean, Your Excellency."
El Fouli answered quickly; "You want to guarantee your success in the elections, and you're asking what's needed. I've drawn you a picture of what's needed."
"A whole 'rabbit'? A million pounds, Kamal Bey? That's a huge amount!"
Azzam had been expecting the amount but preferred to bargain, just in case. El Foull said, "Listen, Hagg, as God is my witness . . .(Here all present repeated, ''There is no god bu God.”)
". . . in constituencies smaller than Kasr el Nil I take a million and a half, two million, and my son Ya**er is standing here in front of you and he can tell you. But I love you, I swear to God, Hagg, and I really want you with us in the Assembly. Plus, I don't take all that for myself I'm just the postman-! take from you and deliver to others, and a nod's as good as a wink."
Hagg Azzam put on a show of uneasiness for a moment, then asked, "You mean, if I pay that sum, Kamal Bey; I'll be sure of winning the elections, God willing?"
"Shame on you, Hagg! You're talking to Kamal el Faull! Thirty years' experience in parliament! There's not a candidate in Egypt can win without our say-so, God willing!"
"I hear there are some big fish intending to nominate themselves for Kasr el Nil.''
"Don't worry about it. If we come to an understanding, God willing, you'll win in Kasr el Nil even if the devil himself stands against you. Just leave it to me, Hagg."
El Fouli then laughed and leaning back and rubbing his big belly said complacently, "People are naive when they get the idea that we fix elections. Nothing of the kind. It just comes down to the fact that we've studied the Egyptian people well. Our Lord created the Egyptians to accept government authority. No Egyptian can go against his government. Some peoples are excitable and rebellious by nature, but the Egyptian keeps his head down his whole life long so he can eat. It says so in the history books. The Egyptians are the easiest people in the world to rule. The moment you take power, they submit to you and grovel to you and you can do what you want with them. Any party in Egypt, when it makes elections and is in power, is bound to win, because the Egyptian is bound to support the government. It's just the way God made him."
Azzam pretended to be confused and unconvinced by El Faouli's words. Then he asked him about the payment details and the other said simply; "Listen up, Hagg. If it's in cash, I'll take it. If it's a check, make it out to 'Ya**er el Faoli, Lawyer' and make a contract with him for any case, as though you were hiring him for it. You understand, of course, that these are mere formalities."
Hagg Azzam was silent for a moment. Then he took out his checkbook and said as he undid his gold pen, "Fine. Let's do it. I'll write a check for half Then when I win, God willing, I'll pay the rest."
"No way, sugar! Shame on you-you'll get me upset if you go on like that. Keep that kind of stuff for school kids. The way I do things is pay first, take later. Pay the whole amount and I'll congratulate you on getting into the Assembly and read the Fatiha with you right now!"
It had been Azzam's last ploy; and when it failed, he surrendered. He wrote out the check for a million pounds, examined it carefully as was his custom, and then handed it to El Faoli, who took it and gave it to his son. Then El Fouli grinned all over his face and said gaily,
"Congratulations, Hagg! Come on, let's read the Fatiha. May the Lord be generous to us and grant us success! You'll find the contract ready with Ya**er."
The four of them-El Faull, Azzaro, and their two sons-closed their eyes, held their hands before their breasts in supplication, and set to reciting the Fatiha under their breath.