[Adam Sandler] I`m sitting in a chair watching the T.V! Its not even on but there`s plenty for me to see! I just lit some crazy a** sh** that my friend over night mailed to me! [Chorus - x1] I`m f**ing Wasted.. It`s the best sh** I ever tasted.. I think they f**ing laced it! Cause im so dayumm yea baked Yea. Well, my freind came over, so i packed him a pipe. I told him u better go easy with this shiiett. But He didn`t believe the hype. He sparked a bowl just to show he could take it! Two minutes later hes playin Back-amound naked! [Chorus - x1] Hes f**ing Wasted.. It`s the best sh** he ever tasted.. Hes lost in f**in space yea! Cause hes so wicked wicked wasted! Woaaahhh, spent the last two hours hidden under my bed cause i looked in the garbage can and think i saw my Uncle Lewes head!ummm im f**in wasted! Well, my friend blew a hit into my pet birds face. The bird laughed hysterically and started to moon walk all over the place.He triped over the tour bus isle and feel on his beak!He looked at the tour bus and started to speak!
[Chorus - x1 Adam Sandler as the pet bird] I`m f**ing Wasted.. It`s the best sh** i ever tasted! My Brains really wasted!Waaahh....im f**ing fried! [Adam Sandler] Now where, sittin in the bath tub wanting sumthing to eat. I wanted pizza and the bird said a pepperoni would be saweeat!Delivery guy showed up 4 hours later, handed me his shoe! I said we ordered pizza buddy wht the hells up with you!? [Chorus - x1 - Adam Sandler as the pizza guy] I`m f**ing Wasted.. It`s the best sh** I ever f**in tasted! Ohhh f**in shiiett!! [Adam Sandler - [Closing] IM WAAAAYYY TOOOO BAKKKKEEDDD!oohnaw. [THE END]