Theres the cool kids Theres the preps and theres the skate punks and the jocks And then theres me Theres the losers Theres the nerds and theres the stoners and the Goths And then theres me But then theres you Cause you're the new kid in the school Not defined by one specific breed And so your free to flip from group to group From scene to scene Cause you're the consulate, the medium, the go-between Which means your perfectly positioned to get me what I need Evan: Look, Archie, Im the wrong guy for this. Archie: One date, thats all Im asking. Evan: Isn't there some nice girl on the special needs bus? Archie: They don't like me Even back before the crutches, it was clear I don't fit here So its hopeless I cant walk right up to Kendra and say Hey, Shed run away But look at you You're making friends and having parties And adapting at impressive speed Just twenty minutes as were sitting so our knees can touch Yes, its a tiny inconvenience, but it means so much
Cause out of all of Indiana, you can get me what I need Evan: Its impossible! Archie: And what I need is Kendra! Others: Kendra, Kendra! Archie: Beautiful Kendra! Others: Kendra, Kendra! Archie: Wonderful Kendra! Make her appear! Boys: If you want a girl, the girl you want is Archie: Kendra! Very hot, Kendra! Boys: Very hot, very hot Archie: Go tell Kendra Im waiting here Heres the problem Every minute, every second that I wait might be too late So lets face it, If I ever had a chance, the time is now, I don't care how Just do your best And I wont bother you again and thats a promise guaranteed So, you can help me out and it can go through very well Or I can turn around and make your life a living hell Its up to you, you've got a choice, you've got incentive to succeed Yes, I know it sounds insane Jerry Lewis can explain You've got to help me, Evan Help me, Evan Help me, Evan Help me, Evan Get me what I need Evan: Ill try! Archie: I knew you would.