[Intro] Ugh... It's already Christmas time again Oh, man.. My parents just don't understand [Verse 1] I want a Girl Talk, but they got me a Jenga Wanted Nintendo, but they got me a Sega I opened that envelope, and what the heck? Grandma just gave me a $5 check (Ugh!) [Chorus] (x2) Christmas s**s, Christmas s**s Wanna bet me? I'll bet you a million bucks Christmas s**s, Christmas s**s Don't mess with me, I don't give a dang [Verse 2] Trucks, and trains, and tinker toys I don't want that junk, that stuff's for boys Barbie dolls, Barbie dolls All I ever ever wanted was Barbie dolls Skipper, Tracy, Christy, Stacy Feeling so Shameless like William H. Macy I might be snails and puppy dog tails But, I like big hair, and I like long nails (Yeah!) [Chorus] (x2) Christmas s**s, Christmas s**s Wanna bet me? I'll bet you a million bucks Christmas s**s, Christmas s**s Don't mess with me, I don't give a dang [Bridge] Oh, my goodness What is that glowing heavenly light over there, descending from the snow-filled sky? It's me, Alaska, The Ghost of Christmas Presents And I'm here to tell you a little something about your situation, sweetheart Girl, why you complaining? You're not in India starving It's not like you don't have nothing You're so dang spoiled, it's alarming You got some parents that love you, a brother that bugs you So lucky that you got a rooftop above you Christmas is cool, so get into it You get what you get and you don't throw a fit [Chorus (Variation)] Christmas rocks! Christmas rocks! Look, I just got a pair of tube socks! Christmas rocks! Christmas rocks! I can even make a fort out of the box! Christmas rocks! Christmas rocks! You wanna bet me? I'll bet you a million bucks Thank you mom and dad, I can't really be sad Cause after all, Christmas isn't really so bad...