Alan Menken - If I Were A Jolly Blacksmith lyrics

[King Richard-sung] If I were a jolly blacksmith What a happy guy I'd be I would do all kinds of blacksmith stuff In my blacksmithery I would hit the thing With the other thing 'Till I made a different thing! If I were a jolly blacksmith! [King Richard-spoken] No, I'm not feeling it Besides, I'd get filthy There must be something better. Ooh! [King Richard-sung] If I were a friendly farmer Wouldn't that be oh so sweet? I'd be planting greens and lots of beans And other things to eat Then I'd plant some eggs, then a couple pigs Then a yummy chocolate cake! [King Richard-spoken] No, that's not right Besides, any moron can plant a cake I want to be special, needed, liked! I've got it! [King Richard-sung] If I were a merry brewer That would be a grand career I would pick the grapes and peel the grapes And stomp them into beer [King Richard-spoken] Dammit! I don't know how to do anything except be a king! No one wants me to be a king [King Richard-sung] If I'm just a jolly nothing What am I supposed to do? I don't have a sk**, no niche to fill No one to come home to Don't know where to go, don't know how to fit Don't know who to even be If I were a jolly tailor, juggler, barber, wet nurse, cesspool worker [King Richard-spoken] Ugh, what difference does it make? [King Richard-sung] I would still be me