Today I feel like Dorothy Parker Today I've got the critical eye I paint my world just a little bit darker Don't even have to try Everyone seems a little bit desperate Oh so witty, but over the edge I don't know why they try to impress you With one foot on the window ledge That's just the way they play it That's just the way they are Think up a line and say it I'll see you all later down at the bar Don't try to understand it It won't get you very far Even the Great Pretender is really as naked a Hedy Lamarr Today I feel like Dorothy Parker Today I'm up here walking the floor The light inside my head getting darker Going to leave this town for sure One block down and another block over There's a place that will make you a drink The night is hot, I believe that I'll go there A pa**word will get you in Play a song by Hoagy Carmichael Play that horn like Beiderbecke too A gla** or two of something you like'll Separate you from these blues Life is a constant party Swung to a shot of jazz Even the broken-hearted Can steal a feel of the razamatazz This is the age of rhythm These are the dancing years Jump through the mirror with them New York has no time for your tears Today I feel like Dorothy Parker Today I've got the critical eye I paint my world just a little bit darker Don't even have to try