Akiva Schaffer - The Old Saloon lyrics

[Intro] [The Lonely Island] (I'm being serious) YO! {*blam blam blam blam blam blam blam*} It's the wild wild West You came to the right place my man Get ready, here we go (NEW sh*t!) [The Lonely Island] Welcome my friends to the old saloon Everyone in town is hangin out If you gotta drink well you drink it down! Then we'll all go have s** with who*es (BRAND NEW!) [The Lonely Island] I'm Buffalo Bill, I just rode into town On my horse, you bet'cha, on my horse That's the thing in the old West times Everybody enjoys a good horseride [The Lonely Island] TRY TO CHEAT AT CARDS YOU'LL GET THROWN OUT Right out the saloon door on your bu*t {*laughing*} Come back in and buy a round of whiskey Guess what? All is forgiven! (DJ LEARY) Flippin the jib with Calamity Jane And you're another guy that's probably an injun [The Lonely Island] This whiskey is warm and it tastes like piss OH NO~! Mustache smells like piss! So that's the story when you get down to it The old wild West is no place for a lady I'm the bartender but I'm also the Mayor So just put that in your pipe and smoke it (“DJ WAAAAAAAAAH”) [The Lonely Island] I'm Tiny Tim and it's almost Christmas Sure is dusty here {*fades out*}