Adventure Capitalists - No Spoilers Allowed lyrics

If you get a call from me Some other people are listening So craft your words for a special agency To the folks who bug our phones I got some stuff you should know So kick back and pull that wire tap real close Darth Vader is Skywalker's dad Soylent green is people, Rosebud is a sled Gollum was a hobbit, Edward Norton's not retarded Matt Damon's skull gets sprayed in The Departed All of the following people will die: Zoe Barnes, Catlyn, Robb Stark, and Kitty Pryde After faking her own d**h, Juliet pulls a reverse But only after Romeo goes first Jesus had a baby in the Da Vinci Code Bruce Willis was a ghost, Chet gets turned into a choad Decker is a replicant, Einhorn is man The suspects were all part of Soze's plan Russel Crowe's friends were all in his beautiful mind Puff the Magic Dragon was a song about getting high Kristin shot J.R., Robert becomes Longshanks' va**al And the princess is always in another castle River Song turns out to be The Doctor's Wife George guns down Gatsby before taking his own life The Chief is a cylon, Sheik is Zelda ninja clad And Cartman's mom is also his dad Jack and Tyler Durden are really the same guy Leonard was Sammy Jenkins, Arch Cummings was a spy The Planet of the Apes was earth all along And I hope the NSA enjoys this song