Adrian Matejka - Chicken & Other Stereotypes lyrics

The officer said, n******g, where's the chicken? & started inspecting the seats of my automobile before I could say anything. It was another one of those cold Chicago days & me & Hattie were standing in the middle of Wabash while the officer slapped the Flyer seats with his straightening club. I'll be the first to admit my automobile has plush seats, but not plush enough for a chicken heist. Like I would stash a stolen hen where I sit. Where I come from, folks name their fowl & talk about those birds like old friends. I offered to pay a fine, but the police officer-- his club dangling from his wrist like an extra arm-- wouldn't hear any of it. He saw I had a money roll the size of a teacup bulging my waistcoat & he still kept searching. I finally told him, "Mr. Officer, please understand: no stolen chicken ever pa**ed the portals of my face. Those chickens see the gleam in my eye & keep out of my way.