30 Dirty Thoughts - Accidental Pimp lyrics

It was a dark and stormy night, and the bar was packed I took a long hard pull on Jimmy, John and Jack My buddies were a mess, we all looked like sh** and I was scanning round the place for any targets to hit I said what next can I get some rough s** Can I find a victim for my next conquest? and just when I lamented that the night was circumvented in walked three fine young contented foxy fine females! We rolled on up, and I tipped my hat thinking time to show these ladies where the cool kids at We didn't mean no harm, and I was dripping with charm but their cool reaction said we'd bought the farm Their eyes cold frost, told us all to get lost, get the hell away, begone at any cost but just when doom was looming conversation was resuming and then they began consuming some tequila shots! Everybody knows somebody who can't control their alcohol And when they've lost those inhibitions accidental pimps can have it all As we watched from afar we saw 'em gulping it down There was so much liquid flowing that I thought they would drown We knew at that point that they were deep in a binge and we had an opportunity to take our revenge so we found a couple guys looking desperate as hell, said for a hundred bucks that they could have some tail then I pointed to the threesome, said it was my little harem, all they had to do was grab'em and the night was theirs! Everybody knows somebody who can't control their alcohol And when they've lost those inhibitions accidental pimps can have it all What I did was wrong, but those chicks were gone, Within moments it was on like donkey kong They never figured out what we'd gone and done, and selling their a** paid for our night of fun I say what now, got a new cash cow, I'm the new king, milk years out of this sow Just when you've made the grade, in this game you always played, threw yourself on the grenade, and you're finally getting laid, who d'ya think is getting paid? Everybody knows somebody who can't control their alcohol And when they've lost those inhibitions accidental pimps can have it all Everybody needs some money (you're drinkin, I'm pimpin, you've lost it, don't know it) at least to buy some alcohol (you're drinkin, I'm pimpin, you've lost it, don't know it) And when your wallet's nearly empty (you're drinkin, I'm pimpin, you've lost it, don't know it) accidental pimps can have a ball (you're drinkin, I'm pimpin, you've lost it, don't know it)